Negative: a couple decided to go poly after some years in a stable monogamous relationship. It seemed to go well for a few months, but the guy apparently told a few white lies here and there, which then got completely out of control and eventually resulted in a disaster for pretty much everyone involved.
Neutral/negative: a couple was poly for maybe half a year or so, then decided it was “too much trouble” and returned to monogamy. I don’t know them well enough to be able to provide more details, but they have been together for a few years after that and are now having a child, so nothing terrible probably happened.
I know plenty of other poly people as well, but don’t know as much of what’s going on in their individual relationships. The general feeling I get is that while a healthy poly relationship certainly isn’t impossible, they are only rarely very stable and often seem to require significantly more attention and work to succeed even when they do (which of course are not negative things to everyone, and it can be worth it anyway in case the freedom and additional partners bring a lot of value). Problems arising from insufficient honesty are pretty common, even among those who would generally seem to value trust and openness, so that’s probably an important thing to watch out for.
Fellow effective altruists and other people who care about making things better, especially those of you who mostly care about minimising suffering: how do you stay motivated in the face of the possibility of infinities, or even just the vast numbers of morally relevant beings outside our reach?
I get that it’s pretty silly to get so distressed over issues there’s nothing I can do about, but I can’t help feeling discouraged when I think about the vast amount of suffering that probably exists—I mean, it doesn’t even have to be infinite to feel like a bottomless pit that we’re pretty much hopelessly trying to fill. I have a hard time feeling genuinely happy about good news, like progress in eradicating diseases or reducing world hunger, because intuitively it all feels like such an insignificant part of all the misery that’s going on elsewhere (and in other Everett branches of course, in case the MWI is correct).
I know this is a bit of a noob question and something everyone probably thinks about at some point, which is why I’m hoping to hear what kind of conclusions other people have reached.