You’ve provided a lot of useful information towards coming to possible paths to the goal you’ve posed.
I’ve a few more questions mainly around the strictness of your constraints that I hope will clarify the space of reasonable solutions.
I’m also trying to point towards a profile for what you consider the boundaries of an interesting person as well as easy heuristics for filtering to find these people.
Regarding (1):
Can you provide some elaboration around what you mean by an “interesting person?”
What heuristics do you currently use to determine whether a person is interesting?
Generally how long does your evaluation period last?
Regarding (2):
In the past, what kind of traits unify people that know you well and whom you would feel comfortable pulling you out if you were acting strangely?
In the past, have any of these people not stand out in a crowd? If so, do these people share traits that are different from the larger group of people who’ve known you well above?
Regarding (3):
How strict is this constraint i.e. how far would you be willing and able to travel on a regular (say weekly?) basis for face-to-face social interaction? The answer could be 0...in which case all social counter-parts would have to travel to you.
Is it possible to get into town via public transit such as a bus or train? Do you know anyone (apart from your mom) nearby who might be willing to drive you into town? For those people who are on the margin in your belief of their willingness, have you tried asking them to test the proposition?
How strict a constraint is your psychological problem with breaking routine? Are we talking no behavior modification on your part, and so simplifying the question to finding people who’re willing to come to you / alter their behavior for you? Or are you open to exploring routine breaking as a means towards this end?
1) Heuristics: It correlates a LOT with reading LW, and also in general sharing interests and internet-cultural background with me, as well as being generally smart/nice/artistic/a formidable specialist at some specific field.
I don’t know what you mean by evaluation process. It’s more like a hidden property I collect evidence for or against, so I’ll hopefully eventually become fairly certain but new evidence can always change my mind. Also the interestingness of people can change as they learn more or I learn more etc.
It’s not rally a very high grade concept that probably doesn’t correspond well to any natural category or predict anything other than my attitude towards someone.
2) #REDACTED#
3) #REDACTED#
I’m getting unconformable with how much I’m revealing about myself.
If you’re uncomfortable, then you can stop here, right now...also, later. No one should feel they need to reveal more than they want. I will not be hurt if you decide you want to stop.
I’m trying to build a profile so that I can think of ways you can find interesting people nearby.
By evaluation process what I mean is...how long do you take to decide whether you want to continue or discontinue talking to someone. In other words, if you meet someone for the first time, when do you know whether they are interesting. By adjusting this process you might be able to increase the number of interesting people you find.
I don’t want to pry into your relationship with your family, and so if you don’t want to talk further about them that is fine. It seems that a lot of stress and a high cost to failure would be major factors to consider in any recommendation.
Questions you definitely don’t need to answer:
How openly can you talk with your family?
Are they in favor or opposed to you socializing with people face-to-face?
If they are in favor, do they have the time / means to help you socialize?
Enlist the help of your family to ferry you to population centers, friends, or wouldbe friends; eventually you’ll have non-family relationships that are strong enough that these new friends can come pick you up on the way elsewhere thus reducing the burden on your family.
Look into activities, hobbies, etc. that involve other people. People often gather around crafting something, music, political activism. You may also find some public debating societies interesting. There are also some public speaking clubs like Toastmasters which should draw people who have something to say and who are interested in meeting people and self-improvement.
Spend some serious time reflecting on and understanding what your criteria for an interesting person is. If you are more “luminous” about this, then you may be able to more efficiently find people nearby who you are interested in.
I will keep thinking on this and see if I can come up with other immediately actionable suggestions.
is already my default solution, but there are no friends or wolfbe friends to be shipped TO, and “population centre” is way to vague
Don’t find things like that interesting and don’t have the time for a hobby like that.
I don’t really think there is anything to know. The word was never made to stand up to any serious scrutiny and is just a kludged pointer in a general direction.
Yes. Asking them to drop you on a street-corner with a lot of people probably won’t go over too well.
How is your time currently distributed? Is there anything you’re currently using your time for that you would be willing to and have the ability to redistribute towards social activities?
Obviously, this is going to subject to cost-benefit considerations, but some sense of how much flexibility you have here will help point towards realizable social activities.
You’ve provided a lot of useful information towards coming to possible paths to the goal you’ve posed.
I’ve a few more questions mainly around the strictness of your constraints that I hope will clarify the space of reasonable solutions.
I’m also trying to point towards a profile for what you consider the boundaries of an interesting person as well as easy heuristics for filtering to find these people.
Regarding (1):
Can you provide some elaboration around what you mean by an “interesting person?”
What heuristics do you currently use to determine whether a person is interesting?
Generally how long does your evaluation period last?
Regarding (2):
In the past, what kind of traits unify people that know you well and whom you would feel comfortable pulling you out if you were acting strangely?
In the past, have any of these people not stand out in a crowd? If so, do these people share traits that are different from the larger group of people who’ve known you well above?
Regarding (3):
How strict is this constraint i.e. how far would you be willing and able to travel on a regular (say weekly?) basis for face-to-face social interaction? The answer could be 0...in which case all social counter-parts would have to travel to you.
Is it possible to get into town via public transit such as a bus or train? Do you know anyone (apart from your mom) nearby who might be willing to drive you into town? For those people who are on the margin in your belief of their willingness, have you tried asking them to test the proposition?
How strict a constraint is your psychological problem with breaking routine? Are we talking no behavior modification on your part, and so simplifying the question to finding people who’re willing to come to you / alter their behavior for you? Or are you open to exploring routine breaking as a means towards this end?
1) Heuristics: It correlates a LOT with reading LW, and also in general sharing interests and internet-cultural background with me, as well as being generally smart/nice/artistic/a formidable specialist at some specific field.
I don’t know what you mean by evaluation process. It’s more like a hidden property I collect evidence for or against, so I’ll hopefully eventually become fairly certain but new evidence can always change my mind. Also the interestingness of people can change as they learn more or I learn more etc.
It’s not rally a very high grade concept that probably doesn’t correspond well to any natural category or predict anything other than my attitude towards someone.
2) #REDACTED#
3) #REDACTED#
I’m getting unconformable with how much I’m revealing about myself.
If you’re uncomfortable, then you can stop here, right now...also, later. No one should feel they need to reveal more than they want. I will not be hurt if you decide you want to stop.
I’m trying to build a profile so that I can think of ways you can find interesting people nearby.
By evaluation process what I mean is...how long do you take to decide whether you want to continue or discontinue talking to someone. In other words, if you meet someone for the first time, when do you know whether they are interesting. By adjusting this process you might be able to increase the number of interesting people you find.
I don’t want to pry into your relationship with your family, and so if you don’t want to talk further about them that is fine. It seems that a lot of stress and a high cost to failure would be major factors to consider in any recommendation.
Questions you definitely don’t need to answer:
How openly can you talk with your family?
Are they in favor or opposed to you socializing with people face-to-face?
If they are in favor, do they have the time / means to help you socialize?
about most stuff verily so, although I can’t count on them to be rational. Think sort of like rationalist!Harry’s situation from MoR.
very much in favor
yes.
I don’t have any standardised “evaluation process”, it depends on the opportunity cost and probabilities of various outcomes for the particular case.
Three suggestions then:
Enlist the help of your family to ferry you to population centers, friends, or wouldbe friends; eventually you’ll have non-family relationships that are strong enough that these new friends can come pick you up on the way elsewhere thus reducing the burden on your family.
Look into activities, hobbies, etc. that involve other people. People often gather around crafting something, music, political activism. You may also find some public debating societies interesting. There are also some public speaking clubs like Toastmasters which should draw people who have something to say and who are interested in meeting people and self-improvement.
Spend some serious time reflecting on and understanding what your criteria for an interesting person is. If you are more “luminous” about this, then you may be able to more efficiently find people nearby who you are interested in.
I will keep thinking on this and see if I can come up with other immediately actionable suggestions.
is already my default solution, but there are no friends or wolfbe friends to be shipped TO, and “population centre” is way to vague
Don’t find things like that interesting and don’t have the time for a hobby like that.
I don’t really think there is anything to know. The word was never made to stand up to any serious scrutiny and is just a kludged pointer in a general direction.
Yes. Asking them to drop you on a street-corner with a lot of people probably won’t go over too well.
How is your time currently distributed? Is there anything you’re currently using your time for that you would be willing to and have the ability to redistribute towards social activities?
Obviously, this is going to subject to cost-benefit considerations, but some sense of how much flexibility you have here will help point towards realizable social activities.
it’s complicated, but the end result is equivalent to “yes, but not much”