If you’re uncomfortable, then you can stop here, right now...also, later. No one should feel they need to reveal more than they want. I will not be hurt if you decide you want to stop.
I’m trying to build a profile so that I can think of ways you can find interesting people nearby.
By evaluation process what I mean is...how long do you take to decide whether you want to continue or discontinue talking to someone. In other words, if you meet someone for the first time, when do you know whether they are interesting. By adjusting this process you might be able to increase the number of interesting people you find.
I don’t want to pry into your relationship with your family, and so if you don’t want to talk further about them that is fine. It seems that a lot of stress and a high cost to failure would be major factors to consider in any recommendation.
Questions you definitely don’t need to answer:
How openly can you talk with your family?
Are they in favor or opposed to you socializing with people face-to-face?
If they are in favor, do they have the time / means to help you socialize?
Enlist the help of your family to ferry you to population centers, friends, or wouldbe friends; eventually you’ll have non-family relationships that are strong enough that these new friends can come pick you up on the way elsewhere thus reducing the burden on your family.
Look into activities, hobbies, etc. that involve other people. People often gather around crafting something, music, political activism. You may also find some public debating societies interesting. There are also some public speaking clubs like Toastmasters which should draw people who have something to say and who are interested in meeting people and self-improvement.
Spend some serious time reflecting on and understanding what your criteria for an interesting person is. If you are more “luminous” about this, then you may be able to more efficiently find people nearby who you are interested in.
I will keep thinking on this and see if I can come up with other immediately actionable suggestions.
is already my default solution, but there are no friends or wolfbe friends to be shipped TO, and “population centre” is way to vague
Don’t find things like that interesting and don’t have the time for a hobby like that.
I don’t really think there is anything to know. The word was never made to stand up to any serious scrutiny and is just a kludged pointer in a general direction.
Yes. Asking them to drop you on a street-corner with a lot of people probably won’t go over too well.
How is your time currently distributed? Is there anything you’re currently using your time for that you would be willing to and have the ability to redistribute towards social activities?
Obviously, this is going to subject to cost-benefit considerations, but some sense of how much flexibility you have here will help point towards realizable social activities.
If you’re uncomfortable, then you can stop here, right now...also, later. No one should feel they need to reveal more than they want. I will not be hurt if you decide you want to stop.
I’m trying to build a profile so that I can think of ways you can find interesting people nearby.
By evaluation process what I mean is...how long do you take to decide whether you want to continue or discontinue talking to someone. In other words, if you meet someone for the first time, when do you know whether they are interesting. By adjusting this process you might be able to increase the number of interesting people you find.
I don’t want to pry into your relationship with your family, and so if you don’t want to talk further about them that is fine. It seems that a lot of stress and a high cost to failure would be major factors to consider in any recommendation.
Questions you definitely don’t need to answer:
How openly can you talk with your family?
Are they in favor or opposed to you socializing with people face-to-face?
If they are in favor, do they have the time / means to help you socialize?
about most stuff verily so, although I can’t count on them to be rational. Think sort of like rationalist!Harry’s situation from MoR.
very much in favor
yes.
I don’t have any standardised “evaluation process”, it depends on the opportunity cost and probabilities of various outcomes for the particular case.
Three suggestions then:
Enlist the help of your family to ferry you to population centers, friends, or wouldbe friends; eventually you’ll have non-family relationships that are strong enough that these new friends can come pick you up on the way elsewhere thus reducing the burden on your family.
Look into activities, hobbies, etc. that involve other people. People often gather around crafting something, music, political activism. You may also find some public debating societies interesting. There are also some public speaking clubs like Toastmasters which should draw people who have something to say and who are interested in meeting people and self-improvement.
Spend some serious time reflecting on and understanding what your criteria for an interesting person is. If you are more “luminous” about this, then you may be able to more efficiently find people nearby who you are interested in.
I will keep thinking on this and see if I can come up with other immediately actionable suggestions.
is already my default solution, but there are no friends or wolfbe friends to be shipped TO, and “population centre” is way to vague
Don’t find things like that interesting and don’t have the time for a hobby like that.
I don’t really think there is anything to know. The word was never made to stand up to any serious scrutiny and is just a kludged pointer in a general direction.
Yes. Asking them to drop you on a street-corner with a lot of people probably won’t go over too well.
How is your time currently distributed? Is there anything you’re currently using your time for that you would be willing to and have the ability to redistribute towards social activities?
Obviously, this is going to subject to cost-benefit considerations, but some sense of how much flexibility you have here will help point towards realizable social activities.
it’s complicated, but the end result is equivalent to “yes, but not much”