Dreaded_Anomaly comments on Call for Anonymous Narratives by LW Women and Question Proposals (AMA)

Dreaded_Anomaly 15 Sep 2012 6:39 UTC
2 points
In the context of Epiphany’s post, these aren’t arbitrary guys:

the ones who do seem good have problems like the above
- Alicorn 15 Sep 2012 6:43 UTC
  5 points
  Parent
  I don’t think I would enjoy a prolonged period of having to manage someone’s desperation on the expectation that there is an otherwise functional guy under all of it. Plenty of guys come functional out of the package, so the opportunity cost of a lot of dysfunction-fussing-with is high. But your advice could be good for people who like fixer-uppers; it’s probably safer and more productive than trying to tame a sociopath or something.
  - Dreaded_Anomaly 15 Sep 2012 7:14 UTC
    3 points
    Parent
    
    Plenty of guys come functional out of the package, so the opportunity cost of a lot of dysfunction-fussing-with is high.
    
    Well, this conversation has managed to go right around in a circle:
    
    From their perspective, you (as a woman in a largely-male group) have many more romantic prospects than they do.
    
    Also, turning “dig a little deeper” into “a prolonged period” seems uncharitable.
    - Alicorn 15 Sep 2012 16:12 UTC
      2 points
      Parent
      Well, yes. I do in fact have many more romantic prospects than a bunch of the guys I know. Should I act like that is false?
      
      Also, turning “dig a little deeper” into “a prolonged period” seems uncharitable.
      
      Prolonged beyond what is enjoyable, or required for me to achieve a comfortable level of confidence that it’s not going to become enjoyable soon.
- Epiphany 15 Sep 2012 14:37 UTC
  4 points
  Parent
  If you read it in context, that means:
  
  “the ones who do seem compatible have problems like the above”
  
  There are a lot of incompatible guys trying to make me like them and hoping they can magically “make it work”, and the ones who do seem good have problems like the above, and I feel a need to cut it short to prevent dysfunction.
  
  You can be dysfunctional and incompatible, which is a fail. Or you can be functional and incompatible, also a fail. Or you can be compatible and dysfunctional, still a fail.
  
  The only thing that’s not a definite fail is compatible + functional.