As it stands your definition simply assigns to one person the responsibility for another person’s feelings. This is infantilizing to the ‘victim’ and places the ‘perpetrator’ at the mercy of the “victim’s” subjectivity.
It seems to me that it is this argument that infantilizes the targets of harassment and other unwelcome behaviour we’re lumping under “creepy”. It only works if these targets are “gormless, passive babies who can’t be trusted to make decisions for themselves”. (That link is on “trigger warnings” but applies here for the same reasons.)
Allowing people to define their own subjective states (“this is how I feel”) seems to me to in fact be the opposite of infantilizing.
“Oh no we’ll all be in trouble if this sort of behaviour is explicitly forbidden” is actually quite a common response in these sorts of discussions, and it is discussed and addressed in the OP’s links.
… how many commenters here have actually read those links? :/
It seems to me that it is this argument that infantilizes the targets of harassment and other unwelcome behaviour we’re lumping under “creepy”.
The problem is that it is not specific behavior that is forbidden. It is more like “making advances while male to someone to who finds you unattractive at the time, or later on” (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=gBVuAGFcGKY) or, in another context “driving while black”.
Actually that’s a very useful and powerful analogy because it also references ingroup vs. outgroup asymmetry, and how that is a driver for power imbalance and perceptions.
… did you even read the post you are replying to? :/
“Allowing people to define their own subjective states (“this is how I feel”) seems to me to in fact be the opposite of infantilizing.”
This has nothing to do with whether defining “creepiness” by how people feel is infantilising. Defining any behaviour that affects someones feelings a certain way is not even close to “allowing people to define their own subjective states.”
As it stands it’s so barely related I have to assume as well as not reading the post you are replying to you are also misusing define.
It seems to me that it is this argument that infantilizes the targets of harassment and other unwelcome behaviour we’re lumping under “creepy”. It only works if these targets are “gormless, passive babies who can’t be trusted to make decisions for themselves”. (That link is on “trigger warnings” but applies here for the same reasons.)
Allowing people to define their own subjective states (“this is how I feel”) seems to me to in fact be the opposite of infantilizing.
“Oh no we’ll all be in trouble if this sort of behaviour is explicitly forbidden” is actually quite a common response in these sorts of discussions, and it is discussed and addressed in the OP’s links.
… how many commenters here have actually read those links? :/
At least one (myself). And many others like them.
The problem is that it is not specific behavior that is forbidden. It is more like “making advances while male to someone to who finds you unattractive at the time, or later on” (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=gBVuAGFcGKY) or, in another context “driving while black”.
Actually that’s a very useful and powerful analogy because it also references ingroup vs. outgroup asymmetry, and how that is a driver for power imbalance and perceptions.
… did you even read the post you are replying to? :/
“Allowing people to define their own subjective states (“this is how I feel”) seems to me to in fact be the opposite of infantilizing.”
This has nothing to do with whether defining “creepiness” by how people feel is infantilising. Defining any behaviour that affects someones feelings a certain way is not even close to “allowing people to define their own subjective states.”
As it stands it’s so barely related I have to assume as well as not reading the post you are replying to you are also misusing define.