Prayer is the best example were I have seen Christians start getting frustrated. Not because they are coming up with excuses, but because they don’t understand why it isn’t working.
I have close friends who are religious, and something that always struck me as both odd and tragic is how they treat their prayers vs. the prayers of others.
When someone else laments that their prayers have not been answered, they reassure them and encourage them to continue praying.
When their own prayers are not answered, they get frustrated and worry that somehow they’re failing God and that they don’t deserve to have their prayers answered.
For others, they act like no excuse is necessary (“God has a plan”), but for themselves they look for one (“I’ve been lax in my faith”).
This is good evidence for the “belief in belief” theory, but is kind of a bummer to think about (How would you feel if you knew the person reassuring you about your prayers actually had the same frustration as you?).
What’s even more of a bummer is how often priests/pastors/etc. get asked “Why does God talk to everyone but me?”
For others, they act like no excuse is necessary (“God has a plan”), but for themselves they look for one (“I’ve been lax in my faith”).
The explanation is that they are just trying to make their friend feel better. You cannot make yourself feel better with the same trick because you know you are secretly condemning your friend for being lax in their faith. You could deny that, I suppose, but I see this more as hypocritical than anything else.
Also, this is significantly more common in certain denominations than others. Some denominations have entire books that solely address this problem.
I don’t think that the people I know are secretly condemning their friends for being lax in their faith. It’s like they feel constant guilt, and don’t identify their bad situations as caused by the same things other peoples’ bad situations are.
Kind of like chalking someone else’s bad behavior up to character flaws but your own to bad circumstances.
Your point about certain denominations is well taken; my friends are almost exclusively one.
I have close friends who are religious, and something that always struck me as both odd and tragic is how they treat their prayers vs. the prayers of others.
When someone else laments that their prayers have not been answered, they reassure them and encourage them to continue praying.
When their own prayers are not answered, they get frustrated and worry that somehow they’re failing God and that they don’t deserve to have their prayers answered.
For others, they act like no excuse is necessary (“God has a plan”), but for themselves they look for one (“I’ve been lax in my faith”).
This is good evidence for the “belief in belief” theory, but is kind of a bummer to think about (How would you feel if you knew the person reassuring you about your prayers actually had the same frustration as you?).
What’s even more of a bummer is how often priests/pastors/etc. get asked “Why does God talk to everyone but me?”
The explanation is that they are just trying to make their friend feel better. You cannot make yourself feel better with the same trick because you know you are secretly condemning your friend for being lax in their faith. You could deny that, I suppose, but I see this more as hypocritical than anything else.
Also, this is significantly more common in certain denominations than others. Some denominations have entire books that solely address this problem.
I don’t think that the people I know are secretly condemning their friends for being lax in their faith. It’s like they feel constant guilt, and don’t identify their bad situations as caused by the same things other peoples’ bad situations are.
Kind of like chalking someone else’s bad behavior up to character flaws but your own to bad circumstances.
Your point about certain denominations is well taken; my friends are almost exclusively one.