Both insightful and somewhat surprising it wasn’t that obvious to you. I really like the search and the frame sexual/romantic/intimate[1].
Amusingly, it seems to me the umbrella term to name “The Thing” is… Trust. This post seems to answer your confusion about the concept of Trust (socially intended), two years ago.
- ^
Maybe it’s because I’m French, but I don’t think “intimacy” is that confusing.
Just skimmed the post. Seems your notion of “unawareness” shares a cluster alongside with Knightian uncertainty and non-realizability in decision and learning theory.