I think that calling the choice to spend more or less time doing financially unrecompensed work in the home an innocuous gender difference, is careless. The harms of the various choices have not been evaluated that well. And it may be impossible to evaluate that harm without bias.
The actual choices people make are often very carefully calculated with regard to benefits. And this includes both the choice to leave ‘home’ work to paid professionals, or unpaid amateurs. And the choice to become a well-paid professional (or self-employed professional).
I totally agree with this point:
(One specific example: women have ovaries, men have testes. Both organs release mind-affecting hormones, in different distributions.)
But rationally understanding the gender bias inherent in different choices does not make cleaning up after any other person, unpaid, a wholly joyous choice.
Circumstance 1) I go to my programming job, write programs for other people, and in the end my household has more money than otherwise.
Circumstance 2) Someone goes to a housekeeping job, cleans up after other people, and in the end their household has more money than otherwise.
Circumstance 3) Someone cleans their own household, part of which involves cleaning up after other people, in place of hiring a housekeeper, and in the end their household has more money than otherwise.
Please clarify why circumstance 2 is “paid” and circumstance 3 is “unpaid”, and why 3 is less “joyous” than 2; 3 may, in fact, prefer to be cleaning up for people they care about, and may be better appreciated. And who says a choice being “wholly joyous” is relevant anyway? My going to work instead of working on my own projects is the right decision (I believe), but it is not “wholly joyous”—just mostly.
My only point is this: gender differences and choice difference probably do not wholly justify the pay inequity between genders. The choice of the word ‘innocuous’ in this case is careless. Do you agree, or disagree?
In answer to your explicit question: I am speaking of negotiable payment, in tokens that can be exchanged in any market. And I am also calculating payment of intangible compensation, like the respect of others and self-respect. I find your actual questions, with quoted words to denote careful usage, confusing.
Payment in ‘increased money for the household’ is fine, and is part of the calculations individuals use to evaluate and justify their choices. And joys.
“wholly joyous” is, in my mind, an unattainable ideal, but the joy, payment, and respect individuals get for the work that they/we do is measurable, if not always negotiable. And the harm is not always considered at all.
I was never addressing the entirety of your argument—on which I have to reserve judgment, having not thought it through entirely.
As it happens, my wife and I both work. We both receive income in tokens that can be exchanged in any market. However, I think this is a meaningless distinction; per the laws of the state of California, money I make isn’t “mine” and money she makes “hers”—money either of us make is “ours”. As either of us works, we have more tokens. As either of us does tasks that save us money, we have more tokens. Describing the latter as not involving “financial recompense” I view as inaccurate.
If you simply wish to state that such work is under-compensated financially, I may agree. If you wish to state that such work is often under-appreciated, I would certainly agree. You stated that house work was financially unrecompensed.
I was simply picking a nit. If it critically undermines your argument, update. If it doesn’t, fix your argument. If you still disagree, please explain why.
I am really enjoying this discussion. And I respect the fact that you are reserving judgment, as you haven’t thought it out very thoroughly.
I didn’t think my objection to the use of the word innocuous through before I voiced it, and I absolutely don’t regret it.
But I am literally having trouble figuring out what else I am supposed to object to. I am willing to try to explain. And I think I can better understand my position, if I understand IF or HOW people disagree with my original objection about word choice. I have not stated this confusion often or clearly enough, so, to set a ‘good’ example, I will state it as a question:
Do you approve of the word innocuous, meaning harmless, in the statement above? Why or why not?
Having said all that, I’ll give it a stab a reply to your more recent comments anyway. The use of a question mark in your words makes it much easier for me to identify your question, and answer it.
Personal note: I am not usually trying to be ironic, but I am aware that I often come across that way. I make special effort on LW to be more precise and direct, and careful in my statements. Taking out the word ‘totally’, which I usually sling about in order to increase positive feedback in my day-to-day life, in order to suggest that I have a sense of humor about my unfortunate ‘know it all’ attitude may have been an error. Feel free to assume I am just trying to make a humorous point instead of a serious one, if you find me offensive on a rational level!
But enough about me...
‘such work’ is not defined, but I assume you are referring to home work, whether paid in negotiable tokens or ‘financially unrecompensed’.
I did not notice stating this:
You stated that house work was financially unrecompensed.
And what the state of CA thinks about the negotiable and non-negotiable arrangements you make with each other, or with employers, I do not really care about, as long as CA does not force you to live there, and there are a wide variety of other options available to you both. Do you have a wide variety of other options?
As either of us does tasks that save us money, we have more tokens. Describing the latter as not involving “financial recompense” I view as inaccurate.
I disagree with your conclusion, but on a somewhat pedantic level. Financial recompense and Optional reduction of financial expense are not equivalent. One is simply a pile of tokens. The other is a choice and a judgment about what to do with a pile of tokens. Do you disagree?
I disagree with your conclusion, but on a somewhat pedantic level. Financial recompense and Optional reduction of financial expense are not equivalent. One is simply a pile of tokens. The other is a choice and a judgment about what to do with a pile of tokens. Do you disagree?
It depends somewhat on whether we are speaking descriptively or prescriptively, in terms of how people think about it.
Do I think that most people consider these to be the same, and that you are some odd outlier for interpreting it differently? No.
I just think this perspective is less useful, and leads to (amongst other things) such work being undervalued. Fundamentally, I have a set of choices in front of me that represent different outcomes; in some of these, my pile of tokens is larger than in others. When my pile of tokens is larger down one path than another, I am being financially compensated for making that choice (or financially penalized for making the other).
Well, I totally agree that ‘such work’ (some paid and some unpaid work in the home) is absolutely undervalued, but I’m not sure what that has to do with any particular perspective.
I don’t know how other people think about the unpaid housework that other people are doing. I personally am grateful for it, but I have never supported anyone who I shared housework with, nor the reverse, and I really do have trouble doing the part I actually recognize as my share. And I have never cared as much about how clean things ‘ought’ to be as any of these roommates and ex-boyfriends did.
In myself, I kind of deplore this tendency to do what I’m inclined to and let the chips fall where they may. I do, of course, always manage to get things clean enough for my own standards. And I do far more housework when I live alone, because nobody else gets ‘fed up’ and takes over.
I had to respond somewhat anecdotally here, and I wish I could keep the more analytical, academic tone of your comment. My main problem with that is I’m not sure if I’m being descriptive or prescriptive, so I don’t know how to respond without figuring that out—but I need a nap first and I wanted to reply right away. If I’ve made it clear which I was doing with this response, that was totally my intention!
I can’t tell if your comment is mostly explanatory, or requests confirmation or introduces a new topic! Taking that nap now.
OK. I consider negotiable tokens to be the only definition of financially recompensed. An optional reduction of financial expense, on an individual level is simply personal budgeting.
In the case of any particular couple, how the work, paid or unpaid, is divided, I don’t really care. Unless the arrangement is a source of stress for that relationship.
I think that a gender-biased pay disparity can aggravate financial stress in heterosexual relationships. And I think that a high disparity in income level can cause a similar stress in any couple, no matter the actual gender or sexual orientation.
The questions of ‘how best can i contribute’ and ‘am I acting responsibly by choosing to contribute, unpaid, in the home while being supported (fully or partially) on someone else’s “dime” (long may it last)’ are difficult and sometimes conflicting questions, whether gender pay inequities are biased. Or irrelevant, because the couple are of the same gender.
Questions I wonder about but do not know the answers to:
How common are one-income households in either situation? How stable are one-income households compared to two income households? I’m pretty sure there’s quite a lot of data on heterosexuals.
Since gender bias probably exists, I wish we could compare it to data on homosexual couples, but they do not get the same social support or suffer the same social pressures… so I’m not sure how meaningful a comparison would be. But I’m still curious.
In the case of any particular couple, how the work, paid or unpaid, is divided, I don’t really care. Unless the arrangement is a source of stress for that relationship.
I agree.
In one of my dreams last night, I was living with a sorceress. She needed some reagents, and her friend on the moon wanted to use a human skeleton for some occult purpose. So she removed my first person perspective/spirit from my body and put it on the mantle across from the magic mirror, so I could see things that were going on. She then incinerated my flesh, leaving charred bones held together in human form by magic.
I then watched an Indiana Jones-style path animation of my skeleton going to the moon, and of magic supplies for my sorceress girlfriend being sent from there to Earth. Other stuff happened in the magic mirror, and eventually there was another path animation of my bones being sent back. My bones were magically cleaned, flesh was put on them, and my spirit was returned to my body.
Despite the fact that she didn’t ask my permission, I didn’t mind and wasn’t bothered by the events as they happened. In real life, I’m a different person and would probably mind such a thing.
My point is that whether something having to do with relative income or who does what in a relationship is a source of stress depends on the mindsets of the people in the relationship. If neither member of a couple minds acquiring goods or negotiable tokens by having one suddenly extrude the other’s soul, scorch their body until their bones are black, and lend them to friends, and they’re happier that way than they would be in less gruesome scenarios...that’s what works for them.
My point is that whether something having to do with relative income or who does what in a relationship is a source of stress depends on the mindsets of the people in the relationship. If neither member of a couple minds acquiring goods or negotiable tokens by having one suddenly extrude the other’s soul, scorch their body until their bones are black, and lend them to friends, and they’re happier that way than they would be in less gruesome scenarios...that’s what works for them.
It seems so obvious when you put it that way. (Upvoted for divine lunacy.)
I don’t want to get involved in the personal business between any two or three+ people, but I also do not mean to suggest that every arrangement that both parties agree to has a matching balance of stress and benefit to both parties. (Love your dream scenario! for me, that would totally be a nightmare.)
And I don’t think any specific gender causes the harm for a pattern of gender differences, like a bias to favor male employees because people report more satisfaction with male employees.
But with a gender-based pay inequity, which couples benefit most? gay men, straight people, or lesbians?
And should we care more about couples than we do about individuals, eg: single women? I don’t think anybody is suggesting this. But this is, in my mind, the primary problem with gender-based pay inequities, and ‘innocuous’ causes are no longer ‘innocuous’ if the harm to individuals is measurable and significant.
gender differences and choice difference probably do not wholly justify the pay inequity between genders.
To say that a situation is not wholly caused by enumerated factors is generally trivially true, so the question becomes how much connotation is intended, which means the question should probably be rephrased.
I don’t think it’s a good idea to ask if states of the world are justified when people disagree about the causes of those states of the world unless great care is taken to not be confusing. Those things can be addressed separately by just talking about causation and also asking what would be justified under a hypothetical set of facts.
And I am also calculating payment of intangible compensation, like the respect of others and self-respect.
I don’t know how to think of those things, particularly self respect, particularly since the frame is not just causation but justice.
To say that a situation is not wholly caused by enumerated factors is generally trivially true, so the question becomes how much connotation is intended, which means the question should probably be rephrased.
Very true, and I must pedantically point out that I did not ask a question about how much connotation was intended. I suggested that the connotation of ‘harmless’ seemed careless to me. Literally and seriously careless, especially given my trivial research into the subject revealed that there is bias for male employees that employers, rationally, respond to.
I don’t think it’s a good idea to ask if states of the world are justified when people disagree about the causes of those states of the world unless great care is taken to not be confusing. Those things can be addressed separately by just talking about causation and also asking what would be justified under a hypothetical set of facts.
I agree. I was trying to avoid this, because I mostly agree. I did not bring up the state of the world, and I seriously did avoid discussion of it in this thread, which apparently was also offensive? I am somewhat concerned about the state of the world, but I already take great care not to be confusing, and fail.
I do have some doubts about drawing conclusions from a hypothetical set of facts, unless those conclusions are testable and, in fact, tested. But I am philosophically inclined to talk hypotheticals long into the night...
I don’t know how to think of those things, particularly self respect, particularly since the frame is not just causation but justice.
Well, I probably care more about justice than I do just word choice. But I do far more for the cause of just word choice than any other. I will apologize for being elusive on more serious issues. I probably could have caused less confusion if I had not specifically tried to avoided answering questions about states of the world. Do you agree?
You think my choice to cook a meal for myself and my wife, rather than (say) ordering a pizza, is not innocuous?
The actual choices people make are often very carefully calculated with regard to benefits. And this includes both the choice to leave ‘home’ work to paid professionals, or unpaid amateurs. And the choice to become a well-paid professional (or self-employed professional).
I totally agree with this point:
But rationally understanding the gender bias inherent in different choices does not make cleaning up after any other person, unpaid, a wholly joyous choice.
My only point is that it is not unpaid.
Circumstance 1) I go to my programming job, write programs for other people, and in the end my household has more money than otherwise.
Circumstance 2) Someone goes to a housekeeping job, cleans up after other people, and in the end their household has more money than otherwise.
Circumstance 3) Someone cleans their own household, part of which involves cleaning up after other people, in place of hiring a housekeeper, and in the end their household has more money than otherwise.
Please clarify why circumstance 2 is “paid” and circumstance 3 is “unpaid”, and why 3 is less “joyous” than 2; 3 may, in fact, prefer to be cleaning up for people they care about, and may be better appreciated. And who says a choice being “wholly joyous” is relevant anyway? My going to work instead of working on my own projects is the right decision (I believe), but it is not “wholly joyous”—just mostly.
It may cause caring about them.
My only point is this: gender differences and choice difference probably do not wholly justify the pay inequity between genders. The choice of the word ‘innocuous’ in this case is careless. Do you agree, or disagree?
In answer to your explicit question: I am speaking of negotiable payment, in tokens that can be exchanged in any market. And I am also calculating payment of intangible compensation, like the respect of others and self-respect. I find your actual questions, with quoted words to denote careful usage, confusing.
Payment in ‘increased money for the household’ is fine, and is part of the calculations individuals use to evaluate and justify their choices. And joys.
“wholly joyous” is, in my mind, an unattainable ideal, but the joy, payment, and respect individuals get for the work that they/we do is measurable, if not always negotiable. And the harm is not always considered at all.
I was never addressing the entirety of your argument—on which I have to reserve judgment, having not thought it through entirely.
As it happens, my wife and I both work. We both receive income in tokens that can be exchanged in any market. However, I think this is a meaningless distinction; per the laws of the state of California, money I make isn’t “mine” and money she makes “hers”—money either of us make is “ours”. As either of us works, we have more tokens. As either of us does tasks that save us money, we have more tokens. Describing the latter as not involving “financial recompense” I view as inaccurate.
If you simply wish to state that such work is under-compensated financially, I may agree. If you wish to state that such work is often under-appreciated, I would certainly agree. You stated that house work was financially unrecompensed. I was simply picking a nit. If it critically undermines your argument, update. If it doesn’t, fix your argument. If you still disagree, please explain why.
I am really enjoying this discussion. And I respect the fact that you are reserving judgment, as you haven’t thought it out very thoroughly.
I didn’t think my objection to the use of the word innocuous through before I voiced it, and I absolutely don’t regret it.
But I am literally having trouble figuring out what else I am supposed to object to. I am willing to try to explain. And I think I can better understand my position, if I understand IF or HOW people disagree with my original objection about word choice. I have not stated this confusion often or clearly enough, so, to set a ‘good’ example, I will state it as a question:
Do you approve of the word innocuous, meaning harmless, in the statement above? Why or why not?
Having said all that, I’ll give it a stab a reply to your more recent comments anyway. The use of a question mark in your words makes it much easier for me to identify your question, and answer it.
Personal note: I am not usually trying to be ironic, but I am aware that I often come across that way. I make special effort on LW to be more precise and direct, and careful in my statements. Taking out the word ‘totally’, which I usually sling about in order to increase positive feedback in my day-to-day life, in order to suggest that I have a sense of humor about my unfortunate ‘know it all’ attitude may have been an error. Feel free to assume I am just trying to make a humorous point instead of a serious one, if you find me offensive on a rational level!
But enough about me...
‘such work’ is not defined, but I assume you are referring to home work, whether paid in negotiable tokens or ‘financially unrecompensed’.
I did not notice stating this:
And what the state of CA thinks about the negotiable and non-negotiable arrangements you make with each other, or with employers, I do not really care about, as long as CA does not force you to live there, and there are a wide variety of other options available to you both. Do you have a wide variety of other options?
I disagree with your conclusion, but on a somewhat pedantic level. Financial recompense and Optional reduction of financial expense are not equivalent. One is simply a pile of tokens. The other is a choice and a judgment about what to do with a pile of tokens. Do you disagree?
It depends somewhat on whether we are speaking descriptively or prescriptively, in terms of how people think about it.
Do I think that most people consider these to be the same, and that you are some odd outlier for interpreting it differently? No.
I just think this perspective is less useful, and leads to (amongst other things) such work being undervalued. Fundamentally, I have a set of choices in front of me that represent different outcomes; in some of these, my pile of tokens is larger than in others. When my pile of tokens is larger down one path than another, I am being financially compensated for making that choice (or financially penalized for making the other).
Well, I totally agree that ‘such work’ (some paid and some unpaid work in the home) is absolutely undervalued, but I’m not sure what that has to do with any particular perspective.
I don’t know how other people think about the unpaid housework that other people are doing. I personally am grateful for it, but I have never supported anyone who I shared housework with, nor the reverse, and I really do have trouble doing the part I actually recognize as my share. And I have never cared as much about how clean things ‘ought’ to be as any of these roommates and ex-boyfriends did.
In myself, I kind of deplore this tendency to do what I’m inclined to and let the chips fall where they may. I do, of course, always manage to get things clean enough for my own standards. And I do far more housework when I live alone, because nobody else gets ‘fed up’ and takes over.
I had to respond somewhat anecdotally here, and I wish I could keep the more analytical, academic tone of your comment. My main problem with that is I’m not sure if I’m being descriptive or prescriptive, so I don’t know how to respond without figuring that out—but I need a nap first and I wanted to reply right away. If I’ve made it clear which I was doing with this response, that was totally my intention!
I can’t tell if your comment is mostly explanatory, or requests confirmation or introduces a new topic! Taking that nap now.
This was my understanding of the comment here, and was what I initially objected to.
OK. I consider negotiable tokens to be the only definition of financially recompensed. An optional reduction of financial expense, on an individual level is simply personal budgeting.
In the case of any particular couple, how the work, paid or unpaid, is divided, I don’t really care. Unless the arrangement is a source of stress for that relationship.
I think that a gender-biased pay disparity can aggravate financial stress in heterosexual relationships. And I think that a high disparity in income level can cause a similar stress in any couple, no matter the actual gender or sexual orientation.
The questions of ‘how best can i contribute’ and ‘am I acting responsibly by choosing to contribute, unpaid, in the home while being supported (fully or partially) on someone else’s “dime” (long may it last)’ are difficult and sometimes conflicting questions, whether gender pay inequities are biased. Or irrelevant, because the couple are of the same gender.
Questions I wonder about but do not know the answers to: How common are one-income households in either situation? How stable are one-income households compared to two income households? I’m pretty sure there’s quite a lot of data on heterosexuals.
Since gender bias probably exists, I wish we could compare it to data on homosexual couples, but they do not get the same social support or suffer the same social pressures… so I’m not sure how meaningful a comparison would be. But I’m still curious.
I agree.
In one of my dreams last night, I was living with a sorceress. She needed some reagents, and her friend on the moon wanted to use a human skeleton for some occult purpose. So she removed my first person perspective/spirit from my body and put it on the mantle across from the magic mirror, so I could see things that were going on. She then incinerated my flesh, leaving charred bones held together in human form by magic.
I then watched an Indiana Jones-style path animation of my skeleton going to the moon, and of magic supplies for my sorceress girlfriend being sent from there to Earth. Other stuff happened in the magic mirror, and eventually there was another path animation of my bones being sent back. My bones were magically cleaned, flesh was put on them, and my spirit was returned to my body.
Despite the fact that she didn’t ask my permission, I didn’t mind and wasn’t bothered by the events as they happened. In real life, I’m a different person and would probably mind such a thing.
My point is that whether something having to do with relative income or who does what in a relationship is a source of stress depends on the mindsets of the people in the relationship. If neither member of a couple minds acquiring goods or negotiable tokens by having one suddenly extrude the other’s soul, scorch their body until their bones are black, and lend them to friends, and they’re happier that way than they would be in less gruesome scenarios...that’s what works for them.
It seems so obvious when you put it that way. (Upvoted for divine lunacy.)
I don’t want to get involved in the personal business between any two or three+ people, but I also do not mean to suggest that every arrangement that both parties agree to has a matching balance of stress and benefit to both parties. (Love your dream scenario! for me, that would totally be a nightmare.)
And I don’t think any specific gender causes the harm for a pattern of gender differences, like a bias to favor male employees because people report more satisfaction with male employees.
But with a gender-based pay inequity, which couples benefit most? gay men, straight people, or lesbians?
And should we care more about couples than we do about individuals, eg: single women? I don’t think anybody is suggesting this. But this is, in my mind, the primary problem with gender-based pay inequities, and ‘innocuous’ causes are no longer ‘innocuous’ if the harm to individuals is measurable and significant.
Great :)
I’ll be responding to the above in several chunks, as it’s gotten large enough to be a bit unwieldy.
To say that a situation is not wholly caused by enumerated factors is generally trivially true, so the question becomes how much connotation is intended, which means the question should probably be rephrased.
I don’t think it’s a good idea to ask if states of the world are justified when people disagree about the causes of those states of the world unless great care is taken to not be confusing. Those things can be addressed separately by just talking about causation and also asking what would be justified under a hypothetical set of facts.
I don’t know how to think of those things, particularly self respect, particularly since the frame is not just causation but justice.
Very true, and I must pedantically point out that I did not ask a question about how much connotation was intended. I suggested that the connotation of ‘harmless’ seemed careless to me. Literally and seriously careless, especially given my trivial research into the subject revealed that there is bias for male employees that employers, rationally, respond to.
I agree. I was trying to avoid this, because I mostly agree. I did not bring up the state of the world, and I seriously did avoid discussion of it in this thread, which apparently was also offensive? I am somewhat concerned about the state of the world, but I already take great care not to be confusing, and fail.
I do have some doubts about drawing conclusions from a hypothetical set of facts, unless those conclusions are testable and, in fact, tested. But I am philosophically inclined to talk hypotheticals long into the night...
Well, I probably care more about justice than I do just word choice. But I do far more for the cause of just word choice than any other. I will apologize for being elusive on more serious issues. I probably could have caused less confusion if I had not specifically tried to avoided answering questions about states of the world. Do you agree?