bury the pen
get a similar pen, put substitute pen in (expected) place of The Pen, and leave The Pen elsewhere
disassemble the pen, reassemble just before sale to Einstein
send it to other people to hold it thru a few steps, like The Onion Router
leave it innocuously in a collection of similar pens
get someone else to do Einstein’s work in 1855, before the evil forces can steal the pen
destroy the pen, get a new one just before sale
destroy the pen, trust that Einstein will find another (he’s really smart, right?)
throw it in a haystack
chemically modify it to be transparent
send the pen to the moon (and hope we can get it back later without relativity)
carry the pen with you at all times to defend it
repeatedly mail it to yourself, so it’ll be “lost” in the postage system for most of the time
send it to Albert’s ancestors and convince them to pass it down as an heirloom
put the pen in a safe (why is this #15?)
surround the pen with something repulsive, to discourage thieves
write with the pen until it’s empty of ink, to discourage thieves (then refill it in 1904)
throw it in a forest
throw it in the ocean
leave glue on the pen (and the pen secured in place), so the thieves get stuck to it
obfuscate your location, so the evil forces don’t know where to look
kill/incapacitate the evil forces
jump to 1905 via time travel (without relativity? hard)
seal it in a lightbulb (or structurally-closest equivalent; they might not have been invented yet)
swallow the pen
leave it to someone else to figure out
put the pen at the end of an obstacle course
the pen is mightier than the sword, so use it to fight the evil forces already
bribe the evil forces to stop conspiring
wrap the pen in many layers
leave it at the top of a mountain
have HPMOR!Quirrell make it a horcrux
establish a cult to worship the pen and protect it
bake the pen into a dish
throw it in the sewer
throw it in Antarctica
convince a church that the pen is holy, and give it to them
get lots of copies of the pen, and scatter them, so if a few get stolen, there’ll still be at least one
make a deal with the devil
suspend the pen in the sky with a balloon
leave lubricant on the pen, so the thieves can’t grip it
wrap wood around it and make it one of a pair of drum-sticks
put the pen in such an obvious place the evil forces will assume it’s fake
leave the pen on a messy, easily-ignored desk
throw it in a parallel universe
give the pen to the evil forces … fooled them! that’s a fake, now they’ll stop looking
throw it in a bush
make the pen a step in a Rube Goldberg machine
leave neurotoxin on the pen, so the thieves die
banish the pen to Iceland
bury the pen
get a similar pen, put substitute pen in (expected) place of The Pen, and leave The Pen elsewhere
disassemble the pen, reassemble just before sale to Einstein
send it to other people to hold it thru a few steps, like The Onion Router
leave it innocuously in a collection of similar pens
get someone else to do Einstein’s work in 1855, before the evil forces can steal the pen
destroy the pen, get a new one just before sale
destroy the pen, trust that Einstein will find another (he’s really smart, right?)
throw it in a haystack
chemically modify it to be transparent
send the pen to the moon (and hope we can get it back later without relativity)
carry the pen with you at all times to defend it
repeatedly mail it to yourself, so it’ll be “lost” in the postage system for most of the time
send it to Albert’s ancestors and convince them to pass it down as an heirloom
put the pen in a safe (why is this #15?)
surround the pen with something repulsive, to discourage thieves
write with the pen until it’s empty of ink, to discourage thieves (then refill it in 1904)
throw it in a forest
throw it in the ocean
leave glue on the pen (and the pen secured in place), so the thieves get stuck to it
obfuscate your location, so the evil forces don’t know where to look
kill/incapacitate the evil forces
jump to 1905 via time travel (without relativity? hard)
seal it in a lightbulb (or structurally-closest equivalent; they might not have been invented yet)
swallow the pen
leave it to someone else to figure out
put the pen at the end of an obstacle course
the pen is mightier than the sword, so use it to fight the evil forces already
bribe the evil forces to stop conspiring
wrap the pen in many layers
leave it at the top of a mountain
have HPMOR!Quirrell make it a horcrux
establish a cult to worship the pen and protect it
bake the pen into a dish
throw it in the sewer
throw it in Antarctica
convince a church that the pen is holy, and give it to them
get lots of copies of the pen, and scatter them, so if a few get stolen, there’ll still be at least one
make a deal with the devil
suspend the pen in the sky with a balloon
leave lubricant on the pen, so the thieves can’t grip it
wrap wood around it and make it one of a pair of drum-sticks
put the pen in such an obvious place the evil forces will assume it’s fake
leave the pen on a messy, easily-ignored desk
throw it in a parallel universe
give the pen to the evil forces … fooled them! that’s a fake, now they’ll stop looking
throw it in a bush
make the pen a step in a Rube Goldberg machine
leave neurotoxin on the pen, so the thieves die
banish the pen to Iceland