There are some people I engage with regularly, either because I expect doing so to leave us better off (for example, because I ordinarily enjoy interacting with them, or we can learn something from one another, or etc.) or because I’ve gotten into the habit and have not yet really noticed that our interactions are no longer providing value, or because I fear the costs of breaking contact are more than I want to pay in the short term despite probably leaving me better off in the long term.
Again, the set of circumstances that can lead me to those expectations are many and varied.
Ah, right. Sorry, I lost sight of your original context.
Hm.
There are people I’ve disengaged with, to whom I’ve never announced disengagement, because I expect the costs of that announcement to be high. For example, I expect them to respond by demanding further explanations for my decision, and then respond to that by explaining why my reasons for disengaging aren’t actually justified, and so on and so forth.
There are people I’ve disengaged with, to whom I’ve never announced disengagement, because it has seemed rude. That is, quietly ending an interaction is one thing, but saying “I’m not going to interact with you any more” has felt (in those contexts) like adding insult to injury.
So, turning those around… I guess the thing that would cause me to respond in this sense is being asked for such an explanation, in a context that makes me confident that the explanation will be accepted. (E.g., “Do you want to continue this conversation? It’s fine if you don’t, I’m just trying to establish whether we’re having a very slow conversation or not having a conversation at all.”)
What set of circumstances (or can you think of a set of circumstances that) would cause you TO respond?
There are some people I engage with regularly, either because I expect doing so to leave us better off (for example, because I ordinarily enjoy interacting with them, or we can learn something from one another, or etc.) or because I’ve gotten into the habit and have not yet really noticed that our interactions are no longer providing value, or because I fear the costs of breaking contact are more than I want to pay in the short term despite probably leaving me better off in the long term.
Again, the set of circumstances that can lead me to those expectations are many and varied.
I don’t mean “to respond regularly” I mean “to make some statement about ceasing interaction.”
Ah, right. Sorry, I lost sight of your original context.
Hm.
There are people I’ve disengaged with, to whom I’ve never announced disengagement, because I expect the costs of that announcement to be high. For example, I expect them to respond by demanding further explanations for my decision, and then respond to that by explaining why my reasons for disengaging aren’t actually justified, and so on and so forth.
There are people I’ve disengaged with, to whom I’ve never announced disengagement, because it has seemed rude. That is, quietly ending an interaction is one thing, but saying “I’m not going to interact with you any more” has felt (in those contexts) like adding insult to injury.
So, turning those around… I guess the thing that would cause me to respond in this sense is being asked for such an explanation, in a context that makes me confident that the explanation will be accepted. (E.g., “Do you want to continue this conversation? It’s fine if you don’t, I’m just trying to establish whether we’re having a very slow conversation or not having a conversation at all.”)