I am also “in the closet” on this. Sex is generally pleasurable; postulating a magic age or stage of development before which sex must be traumatic seems implausible on its face, without some other evidence. Coercion and intimidation are well-known to be damaging, but I don’t understand how merely convincing a 10-year-old to let you stick something up her vagina (and then doing it) is going to do any more harm than, say, spanking her. Furthermore, looking at the historical record, the ancient Greek custom of pederasty (sexual/romantic relationships between adolescent boys and adult men) doesn’t seem to have resulted in widespread trauma.
There are very few places in which it would be safe to propose this hypothesis, though.
Not “generally” over the domain in question. The pleasurability of sex is supported by brain-specific hardware that has no particular evolutionary reason to be active before adolescence.
Without taking a stance on the question of child sexuality—what you say is true, but is there any particular selection pressure for it to be off, either? Evolution goes for the simplest solution, and “always on” seems to me simpler than “off until a specific age, then on”.
Of course, that’s an oversimplification. The required machinery may simply not be developed yet, in the same way that you need to first grow to be four feet tall before you can grow to be five feet tall. But then, when you reach the size of four feet, you already have four fifths of your five feet-tallness in place, so it stands to reason that that at least part of what makes sex pleasurable will be in place before adolescence. Whether it’s active is obviously a separate question, but I don’t think “has no particular evolutionary reason to be active” tells us much by itself.
Anecdotal: I don’t remember having the slightest concept of sexual interest in anything before puberty.
Anyone got trustworthy better data, go ahead (but we have reason to suspect political interference, which is why I go so far as to cite my own anecdotal memory).
I personally know one girl whom, when she was 8, actively went into sex chat rooms and flirted with older men (anywhere from 16 to 40). I don’t think she actually had physical sexual experiences with anyone, though.
I personally know two girls who have had sexual intercourse with adults, one when she was aged 5, the other 8. It was rape in the sense that they were explicitly nonconsentual (they explicitly said didn’t want to do it), but it didn’t traumatized them. One theory might be that “doing stuff you don’t want to do, but adults tell you to do, so you do them anyway” is pretty common at that age (e.g. being forced to clean your room).
I suspect the sex act itself isn’t “pleasurable” for them, but having “sexual relationships” with adults may be pleasurable (since the first-mentioned 8 year old sought it out). It may be seen by many of them as a neutral act (like the 5 and second-mentioned 8 year old) and a form of curious exploration.
This is assuming, for lack of a better term, “gentle loving pedophilia”. The way pedophilia is often portrayed by mainstream media is violent rape, with screaming, kicking and blood. While I don’t personally know of any girl who actually experienced “violent rape pedophilia”, I think it’s safe to assume that they don’t find this pleasurable at all.
Personally, there’s a certain fetish that I have, and I remember it causing me erections even before puberty. However, as far as I can recall, the experience didn’t feel like anything that I’d call sexual these days. It was something that was pleasant to think about, and it caused physical reactions, but the actual sexual tension wasn’t there.
I also recall a friend mentioning a pre-pubescent boy who’d had a habit of masturbating when there was snow outside, because he thought the snow was beautiful. (I’m not sure if she’d known the boy herself or if she’d heard it from someone else, so this may be an unreliable fifth-hand account.) If it was true, then it sounds (like my experience) that part of the hardware was in place, but not the parts that would make it sexual in the adult sense of the word.
The staff caring for 251 children aged two to six of both sexes observed the children’s behaviour and then answered a questionnaire on the behaviours they had observed. … A total of 6% of the children had at some time been seen to masturbate and this usually occurred during rests. Masturbation took place “often/daily” in only 2% of the children. In almost every case the staff judged the masturbation to be associated with desire and relaxation on the part of the child and not in any case as painful, while one child was considered to masturbate compulsively.
It does, however, also remark that child sexual abuse often causes sexualized behavior in children, and that very little is known about what is actually normal child sexuality. Interestingly, as it relates to the original topic, it also mentions a study that found one third of abuse victims to show no symptoms at all.
I wonder what kind of controls they had (ha, ha) that let them say that it caused the sexualized behavior, rather than just letting the children know about sex. I mean I was entirely ignorant of sex until I was 12. I knew it existed by reading and hearing references to it, and I had seen Playboys and the like, but I didn’t have any idea of what sex was.
Mostly the same here. I didn’t have any arousal-like physical reactions, though. It was mostly like the tension of roller coasters and scary stories, not sexual tension. Then, a couple years after puberty, my sex drive kicked in (in the space of days), the fetish was found impossible to handle and promptly repressed until a few years later when it could merge normally with my general libido.
From personal experience (which I am unfortunately too nervous about to go into detail about), pre-pubescent sexuality is primarily based on exposure and knowledge of sexuality. Puberty simply forces one to become aware of sex, rather than being a prerequisite for it. Similarly, sexual reactions (erections, orgasm, etc.) are definitely possible pre-pubescence, simply different. This may be an anomaly in my case, I do not have any non-personal data to share.
Although I do know that Alfred Kinsey compiled an extensive body of research on child sexuality obtained from the interview of pedophiles, in particular one pedophile who was highly active and documented his explorations extensively. I have never read this body of research myself, but I thought its existence might be worth pointing out.
Maybe no interest in anything in particular, but what of the sexual gratification itself ? Children do masturbate, it’s a known fact. Though maybe it’s not universal. But the brain-specific hardware seems to be in place already at any rate.
Anecdotal also, I clearly remember watching the same movie (Star Wars) before and after teenage—the sexual tension passed me by completely as a child but was obvious a few years later.
However, I don’t have evidence that I’d not have enjoyed sex. The desire instinct was offline, that’s all I could swear to.
I could be confusing Freudian stuff with real experimental results, but I seem to remember that children go through a stage up until about 6 where they’re somewhat sexual, and then between that age and puberty the sex drive switches off or even into full reverse. This is the reason that young boys tend to think girls have cooties and are gross, and vice versa. It’s evolution’s way of saying “Not yet”.
I can’t find the article now, but an evolutionary-psychology noticed that the “cooties” concept seems to exist across all cultures (though obviously not always given the name “cooties”), and furthermore noticed that children often don’t consider their siblings to have cooties. I.e. boys will feel that most girls have cooties, but not their sisters.
The psychologist offered this as an explanation: We evolved to find the people we grow up with to be not sexually attractive. This is a mechanism to avoid incest (which can result in genetic problems). However, if you live in a society, you don’t want to find people who grow up with you, but who do not share genes with you, to be sexually unattractive (or else you might find no one within your whole society attractive), and thus this “cooties” sensation was placed by evolution so that we can avoid people of the opposite sex during this critical period so that later on, as adults, we may be sexually attracted to them.
Anecdotal: Approximately 30% of the material on Quizilla et al. Whether they’re writing/reading about it solely because they think it’s adult and edgy is a different matter, but there are clearly many children thinking about this kind of thing at the very least.
Considering that, as has been noted elsewhere on this thread, prepubescent children (including infants) self-stimulate their genitals, this seems … ill-founded. Of course, I suppose it depends how much of the pleasure involves romance, which does seem to be restricted to adults; but I somehow doubt you can claim most of the pleasure from sex is due to romance.
I trust my memory of certain things as far back as a few vaguities before age 2 years, and I’ve read other people’s reports, and I conclude that, while children do self-stimulate, it’s typically (but not always) less pleasurable than it is after puberty.
I haven’t read any neurological studies addressing that hypothesis in particular, but of course they could exist and I could be unaware of them.
Hmm, good point—I don’t actually know anything about the topic. Sounds like actual orgasm is impossible without puberty (although note it’s possible way before adulthood.) Still, pleasure is pleasure. Kids wouldn’t enjoy it as much as adults, but some of the adaptations are clearly present—enough for sex to be pleasurable, if not as pleasurable.
Mind you, I personally wouldn’t want to change that particular norm without a great deal of thought and investigation by actual experts. But this particular claim seems to be flawed.
I’ve encountered anecdotes claiming that a form of prepubescent orgasm is possible, if difficult to achieve (especially since most wouldn’t know to aim for it). I’m less convinced of that, but I remember someone actually providing a citation for “utero orgasms in both sexes” (which I assumed to mean while still in the womb).
An aside: I catch myself committing the mind projection fallacy most often when I come across comments that make it very clear people have purged large chunks of childhood from their memory/identity. It takes me a second or so to remember that this makes sense for most people. This has had a weird effect regarding the subject at hand: I’m surprised when I run into adult males talking like they don’t believe boys can get erections, then I’m skeptical when someone else reports that prepubescent males can have orgasms. Noticing the pattern there has me updating in favor of prepubescent orgasm being possible, if difficult.
I am also “in the closet” on this. Sex is generally pleasurable; postulating a magic age or stage of development before which sex must be traumatic seems implausible on its face, without some other evidence. Coercion and intimidation are well-known to be damaging, but I don’t understand how merely convincing a 10-year-old to let you stick something up her vagina (and then doing it) is going to do any more harm than, say, spanking her. Furthermore, looking at the historical record, the ancient Greek custom of pederasty (sexual/romantic relationships between adolescent boys and adult men) doesn’t seem to have resulted in widespread trauma.
There are very few places in which it would be safe to propose this hypothesis, though.
Not “generally” over the domain in question. The pleasurability of sex is supported by brain-specific hardware that has no particular evolutionary reason to be active before adolescence.
Without taking a stance on the question of child sexuality—what you say is true, but is there any particular selection pressure for it to be off, either? Evolution goes for the simplest solution, and “always on” seems to me simpler than “off until a specific age, then on”.
Of course, that’s an oversimplification. The required machinery may simply not be developed yet, in the same way that you need to first grow to be four feet tall before you can grow to be five feet tall. But then, when you reach the size of four feet, you already have four fifths of your five feet-tallness in place, so it stands to reason that that at least part of what makes sex pleasurable will be in place before adolescence. Whether it’s active is obviously a separate question, but I don’t think “has no particular evolutionary reason to be active” tells us much by itself.
Anecdotal: I don’t remember having the slightest concept of sexual interest in anything before puberty.
Anyone got trustworthy better data, go ahead (but we have reason to suspect political interference, which is why I go so far as to cite my own anecdotal memory).
I personally know one girl whom, when she was 8, actively went into sex chat rooms and flirted with older men (anywhere from 16 to 40). I don’t think she actually had physical sexual experiences with anyone, though.
I personally know two girls who have had sexual intercourse with adults, one when she was aged 5, the other 8. It was rape in the sense that they were explicitly nonconsentual (they explicitly said didn’t want to do it), but it didn’t traumatized them. One theory might be that “doing stuff you don’t want to do, but adults tell you to do, so you do them anyway” is pretty common at that age (e.g. being forced to clean your room).
I suspect the sex act itself isn’t “pleasurable” for them, but having “sexual relationships” with adults may be pleasurable (since the first-mentioned 8 year old sought it out). It may be seen by many of them as a neutral act (like the 5 and second-mentioned 8 year old) and a form of curious exploration.
This is assuming, for lack of a better term, “gentle loving pedophilia”. The way pedophilia is often portrayed by mainstream media is violent rape, with screaming, kicking and blood. While I don’t personally know of any girl who actually experienced “violent rape pedophilia”, I think it’s safe to assume that they don’t find this pleasurable at all.
Personally, there’s a certain fetish that I have, and I remember it causing me erections even before puberty. However, as far as I can recall, the experience didn’t feel like anything that I’d call sexual these days. It was something that was pleasant to think about, and it caused physical reactions, but the actual sexual tension wasn’t there.
I also recall a friend mentioning a pre-pubescent boy who’d had a habit of masturbating when there was snow outside, because he thought the snow was beautiful. (I’m not sure if she’d known the boy herself or if she’d heard it from someone else, so this may be an unreliable fifth-hand account.) If it was true, then it sounds (like my experience) that part of the hardware was in place, but not the parts that would make it sexual in the adult sense of the word.
Googling for “child sexuality” gives me a report from Linköping University which states on page 17:
It does, however, also remark that child sexual abuse often causes sexualized behavior in children, and that very little is known about what is actually normal child sexuality. Interestingly, as it relates to the original topic, it also mentions a study that found one third of abuse victims to show no symptoms at all.
I wonder what kind of controls they had (ha, ha) that let them say that it caused the sexualized behavior, rather than just letting the children know about sex. I mean I was entirely ignorant of sex until I was 12. I knew it existed by reading and hearing references to it, and I had seen Playboys and the like, but I didn’t have any idea of what sex was.
Mostly the same here. I didn’t have any arousal-like physical reactions, though. It was mostly like the tension of roller coasters and scary stories, not sexual tension. Then, a couple years after puberty, my sex drive kicked in (in the space of days), the fetish was found impossible to handle and promptly repressed until a few years later when it could merge normally with my general libido.
From personal experience (which I am unfortunately too nervous about to go into detail about), pre-pubescent sexuality is primarily based on exposure and knowledge of sexuality. Puberty simply forces one to become aware of sex, rather than being a prerequisite for it. Similarly, sexual reactions (erections, orgasm, etc.) are definitely possible pre-pubescence, simply different. This may be an anomaly in my case, I do not have any non-personal data to share.
Although I do know that Alfred Kinsey compiled an extensive body of research on child sexuality obtained from the interview of pedophiles, in particular one pedophile who was highly active and documented his explorations extensively. I have never read this body of research myself, but I thought its existence might be worth pointing out.
Maybe no interest in anything in particular, but what of the sexual gratification itself ? Children do masturbate, it’s a known fact. Though maybe it’s not universal. But the brain-specific hardware seems to be in place already at any rate.
http://www.med.umich.edu/1libr/pa/pa_bmasturb_hhg.htm
Anecdotal also, I clearly remember watching the same movie (Star Wars) before and after teenage—the sexual tension passed me by completely as a child but was obvious a few years later.
However, I don’t have evidence that I’d not have enjoyed sex. The desire instinct was offline, that’s all I could swear to.
Also anecdotal: I have liked girls continuously since the age of 4. I do not recommend this....
This is also my experience.
I could be confusing Freudian stuff with real experimental results, but I seem to remember that children go through a stage up until about 6 where they’re somewhat sexual, and then between that age and puberty the sex drive switches off or even into full reverse. This is the reason that young boys tend to think girls have cooties and are gross, and vice versa. It’s evolution’s way of saying “Not yet”.
I can’t find the article now, but an evolutionary-psychology noticed that the “cooties” concept seems to exist across all cultures (though obviously not always given the name “cooties”), and furthermore noticed that children often don’t consider their siblings to have cooties. I.e. boys will feel that most girls have cooties, but not their sisters.
The psychologist offered this as an explanation: We evolved to find the people we grow up with to be not sexually attractive. This is a mechanism to avoid incest (which can result in genetic problems). However, if you live in a society, you don’t want to find people who grow up with you, but who do not share genes with you, to be sexually unattractive (or else you might find no one within your whole society attractive), and thus this “cooties” sensation was placed by evolution so that we can avoid people of the opposite sex during this critical period so that later on, as adults, we may be sexually attracted to them.
That “explanation” sounds awfully just-so-story to me.
Why would evolution want to say this? What harm is there in sexual relations before puberty, when pregnancy can’t result?
Anecdotal: Approximately 30% of the material on Quizilla et al. Whether they’re writing/reading about it solely because they think it’s adult and edgy is a different matter, but there are clearly many children thinking about this kind of thing at the very least.
Considering that, as has been noted elsewhere on this thread, prepubescent children (including infants) self-stimulate their genitals, this seems … ill-founded. Of course, I suppose it depends how much of the pleasure involves romance, which does seem to be restricted to adults; but I somehow doubt you can claim most of the pleasure from sex is due to romance.
I trust my memory of certain things as far back as a few vaguities before age 2 years, and I’ve read other people’s reports, and I conclude that, while children do self-stimulate, it’s typically (but not always) less pleasurable than it is after puberty.
I haven’t read any neurological studies addressing that hypothesis in particular, but of course they could exist and I could be unaware of them.
Hmm, good point—I don’t actually know anything about the topic. Sounds like actual orgasm is impossible without puberty (although note it’s possible way before adulthood.) Still, pleasure is pleasure. Kids wouldn’t enjoy it as much as adults, but some of the adaptations are clearly present—enough for sex to be pleasurable, if not as pleasurable.
Mind you, I personally wouldn’t want to change that particular norm without a great deal of thought and investigation by actual experts. But this particular claim seems to be flawed.
I’ve encountered anecdotes claiming that a form of prepubescent orgasm is possible, if difficult to achieve (especially since most wouldn’t know to aim for it). I’m less convinced of that, but I remember someone actually providing a citation for “utero orgasms in both sexes” (which I assumed to mean while still in the womb).
An aside: I catch myself committing the mind projection fallacy most often when I come across comments that make it very clear people have purged large chunks of childhood from their memory/identity. It takes me a second or so to remember that this makes sense for most people. This has had a weird effect regarding the subject at hand: I’m surprised when I run into adult males talking like they don’t believe boys can get erections, then I’m skeptical when someone else reports that prepubescent males can have orgasms. Noticing the pattern there has me updating in favor of prepubescent orgasm being possible, if difficult.