Men are supposed to compete with other men. Women are supposed to compete with other women.
A woman trying to compete with a man she likes is playing a lose/lose game. If she loses, she will hate him for making her lose. If she wins, she will stop respecting him for being a loser.
I guess the confusion happens because women are encouraged to take traditional men’s roles, be competitive, make careers, etc. And, as long as it’s “just work”, why not? But do not bring that style into a relationship. Relations are not supposed to be competitions. Perhaps seeing the man of your dreams being competitive makes you horny, but it doesn’t work the other way round. Men often have enough competition at their work; they want to take a break at home.
(Also, male hierarchies have different traditional rules of fighting than female hierarchies. Men fight hard; then they shake hands and have a beer together. Women smile at each other, and wait for the right moment to stab in the back; they never forgive. So, a man and a woman fighting will perceive each other as someone who breaks the rules. “Why does he always have to win?” “Why can’t she ever leave the subject?”)
Men are supposed to compete with other men. Women are supposed to compete with other women.
A woman trying to compete with a man she likes is playing a lose/lose game. If she loses, she will hate him for making her lose. If she wins, she will stop respecting him for being a loser.
I guess the confusion happens because women are encouraged to take traditional men’s roles, be competitive, make careers, etc. And, as long as it’s “just work”, why not? But do not bring that style into a relationship. Relations are not supposed to be competitions. Perhaps seeing the man of your dreams being competitive makes you horny, but it doesn’t work the other way round. Men often have enough competition at their work; they want to take a break at home.
(Also, male hierarchies have different traditional rules of fighting than female hierarchies. Men fight hard; then they shake hands and have a beer together. Women smile at each other, and wait for the right moment to stab in the back; they never forgive. So, a man and a woman fighting will perceive each other as someone who breaks the rules. “Why does he always have to win?” “Why can’t she ever leave the subject?”)
jfc