In each of these 3 examples the person with AS is actually being considerate
I agreed with all of your comment but this: the person with AS is not “being considerate”, when “being considerate” is defined to include modeling the likely preferences of the person you are supposedly “considering.”
In each case, the “consideration” is considering themselves, in the other person’s shoes, falling prey to availability bias.
Personally, I am very torn on the doorway example—I usually make an effort to hold the door, but am very uncomfortable. I think it will help to remember in future that the availability bias of my own preferences shouldn’t rule out being considerate of what the likely preference of the other person is… and to change my SASS rules so that I feel good about holding the door, so it’s self-reinforcing.
I agreed with all of your comment but this: the person with AS is not “being considerate”, when “being considerate” is defined to include modeling the likely preferences of the person you are supposedly “considering.”
In each case, the “consideration” is considering themselves, in the other person’s shoes, falling prey to availability bias.
Personally, I am very torn on the doorway example—I usually make an effort to hold the door, but am very uncomfortable. I think it will help to remember in future that the availability bias of my own preferences shouldn’t rule out being considerate of what the likely preference of the other person is… and to change my SASS rules so that I feel good about holding the door, so it’s self-reinforcing.