From the outside, “creepiness” looks a lot like “ew, he doesn’t play the social game on my level and should therefore be reviled and shamed”. I understand that there’s more to it, but that particular aspect looks downright evil.
I don’t think this is usually the case, especially not within the context of rationalist gatherings. I have had several interactions with people on (or who seem to be on) the Autism spectrum, and I have not ever felt creeped on by them, and most of my interactions have been positive with them. While it seems that low status men are more likely to act creepily, I do not automatically feel this way about someone who is low status, and I do feel creeped out by high status people who disrespect my boundaries. So I don’t think this is a significant part of creepiness.
So, can someone remind me why I should go out of my way to adjust myself to be women-compatible? I’ve already given up on 95% of people, why not another 50% (actually more like 10%) of the remainder if it saves me trouble and improves my life?
As a woman, I would rather avoid people like you anyway. Hope that helps.
As a woman, I would rather avoid people like you anyway. Hope that helps.
As a woman(The half of the species you find interesting and attractive sexually), I would rather avoid people like you(people with low self esteem who are worried about offending me) anyway(regardless of what you try to do to change or become a better person you will always be scum). Hope that helps.
If I imagine a similar post in which all references to “women” have been replaced by references to some other group with which I identify more strongly, like “Jews” or “queer men” or “white people,” my desire to interact with the hypothetical author of that hypothetical post similarly plunges, to varying degrees.
If the reason for that plunge were the author’s admission to low status, it would seem to follow that I could infer the status of various groups in my society from the degree of plunge. I haven’t thought too hard about this, but I doubt that would actually work terribly well.
Imagine the “creepiness” question were also coordinated on race; black people come off as creepy, and a black person complains that all the complaints white people make about creepy black people makes them disinclined to try to interact with white people.
Does this change how you regard the hypothetical author?
Do you mean a post that also says the same things about white people that n_s’s post says about women (e.g., that the author becomes subhuman around white people, that interacting with white people is distressing, that white people are less interesting than black people and that the author’s occasional belief otherwise is simply an illusion they ought to adjust for)?
Yeah, I expect that would change how I regard the author. I mean, if nothing else, I’m a white person, and it’s difficult to listen to that sort of thing without having an emotional reaction to it.
Or do you just mean a post that says that the complaints of white people about black creepiness make the author disinclined to try to interact with us? I expect that would change how I regard the author less.
The latter is how I interpret nyansandwich’s post; it’s what it starts with, it’s how it justifies the former points, and what it isn’t used to justify comes off as something like sour grapes. (How does nyan_sandwich know how interesting women are if he’s too nervous to interact with them on a human level?)
Can’t really criticize you for taking the more negative interpretation, however, since I do the same thing pretty frequently.
Especially given that the “more negative interpretation” in this case involves treating the author’s statements about their experience as accurately describing their experience.
But, sure, if I restrict my attention to only those claims which are somehow justified by the assertion that the complaints of women about male creepiness make the author disinclined to try to interact with women, my reaction to the post is very different.
That said, I’m not sure why I ought to restrict my attention in that way.
I’m quite sure the creepiness question is coordinated on race. Black men often have a really difficult time hitting on white women without coming off as creepy.
He’s said that he doesn’t really enjoy the company of women and that they make him “subhuman.” I think that’s reason enough to not want to be around him if you’re female!
Is it because he admitted to being socially low status?
I did no such thing! I expressed sympathy with socially unprivileged men, and complained about how my interactions with women tend to be driven by sexuality rather than friendship.
I’m actually rather high status (eg. everyone shuts up and listens when I talk, and I’m not shy at all.) in the circles I move in.
I don’t think this is usually the case, especially not within the context of rationalist gatherings. I have had several interactions with people on (or who seem to be on) the Autism spectrum, and I have not ever felt creeped on by them, and most of my interactions have been positive with them. While it seems that low status men are more likely to act creepily, I do not automatically feel this way about someone who is low status, and I do feel creeped out by high status people who disrespect my boundaries. So I don’t think this is a significant part of creepiness.
As a woman, I would rather avoid people like you anyway. Hope that helps.
My brain just doesn’t wrap around that and find the second sentence true.
You don’t believe I have never felt creeped out by an autistic person? Or what?
I apologize, I should have quoted. I was referring to the last couple of sentences.
Sorry, I am still not sure what you mean.
How could you possibly think saying that would help?
Presumably they are asking for some explanation of how the last couple of sentences related to what buybuydandavis was saying.
As a woman(The half of the species you find interesting and attractive sexually), I would rather avoid people like you(people with low self esteem who are worried about offending me) anyway(regardless of what you try to do to change or become a better person you will always be scum). Hope that helps.
Why is this? Is it because he admitted to being socially low status?
If I imagine a similar post in which all references to “women” have been replaced by references to some other group with which I identify more strongly, like “Jews” or “queer men” or “white people,” my desire to interact with the hypothetical author of that hypothetical post similarly plunges, to varying degrees.
If the reason for that plunge were the author’s admission to low status, it would seem to follow that I could infer the status of various groups in my society from the degree of plunge. I haven’t thought too hard about this, but I doubt that would actually work terribly well.
Imagine the “creepiness” question were also coordinated on race; black people come off as creepy, and a black person complains that all the complaints white people make about creepy black people makes them disinclined to try to interact with white people.
Does this change how you regard the hypothetical author?
Do you mean a post that also says the same things about white people that n_s’s post says about women (e.g., that the author becomes subhuman around white people, that interacting with white people is distressing, that white people are less interesting than black people and that the author’s occasional belief otherwise is simply an illusion they ought to adjust for)?
Yeah, I expect that would change how I regard the author. I mean, if nothing else, I’m a white person, and it’s difficult to listen to that sort of thing without having an emotional reaction to it.
Or do you just mean a post that says that the complaints of white people about black creepiness make the author disinclined to try to interact with us? I expect that would change how I regard the author less.
The latter is how I interpret nyansandwich’s post; it’s what it starts with, it’s how it justifies the former points, and what it isn’t used to justify comes off as something like sour grapes. (How does nyan_sandwich know how interesting women are if he’s too nervous to interact with them on a human level?)
Can’t really criticize you for taking the more negative interpretation, however, since I do the same thing pretty frequently.
Especially given that the “more negative interpretation” in this case involves treating the author’s statements about their experience as accurately describing their experience.
But, sure, if I restrict my attention to only those claims which are somehow justified by the assertion that the complaints of women about male creepiness make the author disinclined to try to interact with women, my reaction to the post is very different.
That said, I’m not sure why I ought to restrict my attention in that way.
FYI, the former “uncharitable” interpretation is correct.
I’m quite sure the creepiness question is coordinated on race. Black men often have a really difficult time hitting on white women without coming off as creepy.
Probably because of wall of text phrased in rather misogynistic terms, (which were not really strictly necessary)
He’s said that he doesn’t really enjoy the company of women and that they make him “subhuman.” I think that’s reason enough to not want to be around him if you’re female!
I did no such thing! I expressed sympathy with socially unprivileged men, and complained about how my interactions with women tend to be driven by sexuality rather than friendship.
I’m actually rather high status (eg. everyone shuts up and listens when I talk, and I’m not shy at all.) in the circles I move in.
Sorry about being unclear.
This is generally a status-lowering move. If you can afford that in real life, it could be a counter-signal, but it probably doesn’t work online.
Or perhaps because he is as bitter as quinine?