“You can speak to me candidly and I won’t throw a fit” is a concession. “I’m about to speak candidly” is a warning. “I’m about to speak candidly, and that might upset you, but you have to be nice when you respond anyway, and if you’re not going to be nice, then I don’t want to play with you” is an ultimatum. “I’m about to speak candidly, so you’re going to agree to not throw a fit” is an ultimatum with extra squick factor.
You might want to try reading what I actually wrote, instead of putting words in my mouth.
What you think I said:
...but you have to be nice when you respond anyway, and if you’re not going to be nice, then I don’t want to play with you”
″...so you’re going to agree to not throw a fit”
These are not at all what I said. Your own definition of a warning (“I’m about to speak candidly’) is pretty much exactly what I said (with the addendum that I added in the grandparent “so if you don’t want to hear candidness, don’t read it.”)
So let’s look exactly at what I said:
Crocker’s Warning- Submitters were told to not hold back for politeness, so this is your warning that Crocker’s Rules apply to the following content
Notice how I DON’T AT ALL say the types of ultimatums you seem to think I said.
I am tapping out of the Crocker’s Warning discussion, because I feel like it has fallen to logical rudeness
Notice how I DON’T AT ALL say the types of ultimatums you seem to think I said.
I think the confusion comes from your use of the phrase “Crocker’s Rules” in the explanation (the word “Crocker” shows up twice; I’m referring to the second time). If what you meant was “these are candid comments; if you consider candidness impolite, I suggest you not read this post,” then you should have just said that.
As it is, the warning seems incoherent, because you refer to a known concept (Crocker’s Rules) incorrectly. When I first read it, the impression I got was that we could respond to the anonymous anecdotes without any consideration for politeness, which seemed really bizarre.
It was especially bizarre because, for this post at least, there doesn’t seem to be anything about LW in particular. There’s just a reasonable explanation of inferential distance and anecdotes about people being mistreated in their day to day lives to lower that distance.
I thought that my last examples were, respectively, a fair paraphrasing of social consequences for not respecting the warning and a fair desugaring of your original statment when “Crocker’s rules” is tabooed. However, this is not the first time I have been accused of putting words into others’ mouths, so I will provisionally accept that I have acted rudely.
I am sorry that I misrepresented your position, and misrepresented it to your disadvantage. My prior comment is retracted.
“You can speak to me candidly and I won’t throw a fit” is a concession. “I’m about to speak candidly” is a warning. “I’m about to speak candidly, and that might upset you, but you have to be nice when you respond anyway, and if you’re not going to be nice, then I don’t want to play with you” is an ultimatum. “I’m about to speak candidly, so you’re going to agree to not throw a fit” is an ultimatum with extra squick factor.
You might want to try reading what I actually wrote, instead of putting words in my mouth.
What you think I said:
These are not at all what I said. Your own definition of a warning (“I’m about to speak candidly’) is pretty much exactly what I said (with the addendum that I added in the grandparent “so if you don’t want to hear candidness, don’t read it.”)
So let’s look exactly at what I said:
Notice how I DON’T AT ALL say the types of ultimatums you seem to think I said.
I am tapping out of the Crocker’s Warning discussion, because I feel like it has fallen to logical rudeness
I think the confusion comes from your use of the phrase “Crocker’s Rules” in the explanation (the word “Crocker” shows up twice; I’m referring to the second time). If what you meant was “these are candid comments; if you consider candidness impolite, I suggest you not read this post,” then you should have just said that.
As it is, the warning seems incoherent, because you refer to a known concept (Crocker’s Rules) incorrectly. When I first read it, the impression I got was that we could respond to the anonymous anecdotes without any consideration for politeness, which seemed really bizarre.
It was especially bizarre because, for this post at least, there doesn’t seem to be anything about LW in particular. There’s just a reasonable explanation of inferential distance and anecdotes about people being mistreated in their day to day lives to lower that distance.
Thank you. I think that this comment is the most constructive criticism on the topic, and have edited my post to include your wording.
You’re welcome! Glad I could help.
I thought that my last examples were, respectively, a fair paraphrasing of social consequences for not respecting the warning and a fair desugaring of your original statment when “Crocker’s rules” is tabooed. However, this is not the first time I have been accused of putting words into others’ mouths, so I will provisionally accept that I have acted rudely.
I am sorry that I misrepresented your position, and misrepresented it to your disadvantage. My prior comment is retracted.