I think that when a task is something you deem that you “should” do—perhaps something you would feel guilty about for not doing—then it’s already really not the first thing you want to do. Thus, without a lot of self-discipline, an extenuating circumstance is readily accepted. Perhaps too readily -- and there would be the reason for the negative judgement.
Compare this with something that a person is driven to do; something they want to do sincerely so that they would be very stubborn in not accepting any obstacles. (While it could be something they feel they “should” do as well, the feeling when presented with an obstacle is annoyance or anger or despair rather than guilt.)
Thus when someone gives up too easily, I try to temper my frustration and disappointment by accepting that it must not have been a priority for them. As well, when I disappoint myself for not trying hard enough, it is a cue to me to stop feeling guilty and list my priorities more honestly. Somewhere along the way, I assigned more priority to a task than I actually feel—otherwise I would have tried harder.
Consider any great success, especially unusual success in extenuating circumstances (e.g., being 12). That person just wanted to do it.
Related to this is the difference between wanting something, and wanting to want something.
I can tell myself that I want to exercise more, or learn photography, or eat better, but if I don’t do those things, I don’t really want them. I simply WANT to want them, because I want the end result that each one of them brings. It’s closely related to belief in belief. “If I believed in God I would be a good and virtuous person and go to heaven” is very similar to “If I ate right I would have more energy and be healthier”
A big part of prioritizing is seperating the things you want from the things you WANT to want. The things you want are the ones that you’re willing to put the work in for.
I may be mistaken, but I’m doing something similar. That looked like a good idea when I started, but nowadays I’d question whether I’m really better off.
I have a tendancy to give up too easily on many things. While I know my own priorities well, and have come to accept them, doing away with the guilt that’d prevent me from doing what I want. After all, I had accepted the idea that what I ought to do, but didn’t really want to, I couldn’t do well anyway, so I could as well just do what I want, and do it well.
Except that working again and again on something makes it become easier on the long term. If you don’t train your willpower, if you never try to make one of those big, uncomfortable, impossible looking efforts, if you allow yourself to only do what you feel for, as opposed to what you reason would be good to do, yet which you still don’t really want to do … well I can only speak for myself, but I’ve pretty much ended up doing only the things that I can do effortlessly, or which I desire, and have very little willpower left to oblige myself doing what is sometimes right, or even necessary, but not desirable.
I think that when a task is something you deem that you “should” do—perhaps something you would feel guilty about for not doing—then it’s already really not the first thing you want to do. Thus, without a lot of self-discipline, an extenuating circumstance is readily accepted. Perhaps too readily -- and there would be the reason for the negative judgement.
Compare this with something that a person is driven to do; something they want to do sincerely so that they would be very stubborn in not accepting any obstacles. (While it could be something they feel they “should” do as well, the feeling when presented with an obstacle is annoyance or anger or despair rather than guilt.)
Thus when someone gives up too easily, I try to temper my frustration and disappointment by accepting that it must not have been a priority for them. As well, when I disappoint myself for not trying hard enough, it is a cue to me to stop feeling guilty and list my priorities more honestly. Somewhere along the way, I assigned more priority to a task than I actually feel—otherwise I would have tried harder.
Consider any great success, especially unusual success in extenuating circumstances (e.g., being 12). That person just wanted to do it.
Related to this is the difference between wanting something, and wanting to want something.
I can tell myself that I want to exercise more, or learn photography, or eat better, but if I don’t do those things, I don’t really want them. I simply WANT to want them, because I want the end result that each one of them brings. It’s closely related to belief in belief. “If I believed in God I would be a good and virtuous person and go to heaven” is very similar to “If I ate right I would have more energy and be healthier”
A big part of prioritizing is seperating the things you want from the things you WANT to want. The things you want are the ones that you’re willing to put the work in for.
I may be mistaken, but I’m doing something similar. That looked like a good idea when I started, but nowadays I’d question whether I’m really better off. I have a tendancy to give up too easily on many things. While I know my own priorities well, and have come to accept them, doing away with the guilt that’d prevent me from doing what I want. After all, I had accepted the idea that what I ought to do, but didn’t really want to, I couldn’t do well anyway, so I could as well just do what I want, and do it well.
Except that working again and again on something makes it become easier on the long term. If you don’t train your willpower, if you never try to make one of those big, uncomfortable, impossible looking efforts, if you allow yourself to only do what you feel for, as opposed to what you reason would be good to do, yet which you still don’t really want to do … well I can only speak for myself, but I’ve pretty much ended up doing only the things that I can do effortlessly, or which I desire, and have very little willpower left to oblige myself doing what is sometimes right, or even necessary, but not desirable.
Yes! I’m pondering a post on the subject of apathy, and am eager to hear what Eliezer in particular has to say on the subject.