While I’m normally all for sounding mysterious—in this situation, won’t people just think you’re a recovering alcoholic who’s done something regrettable?
Agreed, at least to a certain extant, but I’m not sure that this would be perceived as a social negative unless the details of the ‘something regrettable’ were elaborated upon.
I would expect that being seen as a “recovering alcoholic who’s done something regrettable”—and hence weak-willed, unreliable, possibly violent, possibly a criminal, etc. - would have negative social effects.
Besides, do you really expect that if you don’t elaborate, people won’t speculate?
However, I find your comment “surprising,” would you care to explain your thoughts?
Disclaimer: I don’t actually have any experience in the type of situation being discussed. If someone has observations that contradict my hypothesis, then I am most likely wrong (at least with regard to the specific social/cultural setting in which the observations take place.)
If someone’s concluded that you’re a recovering alcoholic from the statement “I have my reasons,” then they will also probably conclude that you’re trying hard to change that, considering that you’re refusing to drink alcohol right here and now. The main social negative that I could see coming out of the situation is that the “stone-cold dead delivery” might make someone think that you’re particularly sensitive or have a temper.
I would start by saying the line in a more neutral tone, perhaps with a quirk to one side of your mouth and a slight shrug, giving the impression that you’re shrugging off something mildly unpleasant but aren’t upset at person talking to you. If he pushes the point, I would aim for a flatter tone.
Excellent suggestion. I’ll have to try this one.
While I’m normally all for sounding mysterious—in this situation, won’t people just think you’re a recovering alcoholic who’s done something regrettable?
I think this is very likely.
Agreed, at least to a certain extant, but I’m not sure that this would be perceived as a social negative unless the details of the ‘something regrettable’ were elaborated upon.
I would expect that being seen as a “recovering alcoholic who’s done something regrettable”—and hence weak-willed, unreliable, possibly violent, possibly a criminal, etc. - would have negative social effects. Besides, do you really expect that if you don’t elaborate, people won’t speculate?
However, I find your comment “surprising,” would you care to explain your thoughts?
Disclaimer: I don’t actually have any experience in the type of situation being discussed. If someone has observations that contradict my hypothesis, then I am most likely wrong (at least with regard to the specific social/cultural setting in which the observations take place.)
If someone’s concluded that you’re a recovering alcoholic from the statement “I have my reasons,” then they will also probably conclude that you’re trying hard to change that, considering that you’re refusing to drink alcohol right here and now. The main social negative that I could see coming out of the situation is that the “stone-cold dead delivery” might make someone think that you’re particularly sensitive or have a temper.
I would start by saying the line in a more neutral tone, perhaps with a quirk to one side of your mouth and a slight shrug, giving the impression that you’re shrugging off something mildly unpleasant but aren’t upset at person talking to you. If he pushes the point, I would aim for a flatter tone.