I think a miscommunication is happening here, and I think it’s because I used the word “boundary” for two different things (because that’s how it’s used out in the wild).
MSRayne seems to be trying to communicate that any violation of their personal boundary is non-benign. This is not a claim that the OP disagrees with; in fact, it’s a claim that the OP specifically makes.
I think ambigram is trying to talk about violations of the social boundary, and pointing out that those may very well be benign. MSRayne is saying “no, not in my experience,” but afaict MSRayne has also self-identified as being in the set of [people whose personal boundaries already lie outside of the social boundary, such that even things which do not violate the social boundary are already violating their personal boundary].
I think I don’t understand the difference between social and personal boundaries. Like, I read the post, I intellectually recognize the existence of this difference, but I have never noticed social boundaries, only my own personal ones. Presumably because my own are more strict, as you said. At some point I expect I must have absorbed a lot of them from the social milieu—but my social milieu growing up was television and books, and I deeply learned “avoid anything that looks like a situation on TV that made me cringe”, among other things.
MSRayne is saying “no, not in my experience,” but afaict MSRayne has also self-identified as being in the set of [people whose personal boundaries already lie outside of the social boundary, such that even things which do not violate the social boundary are already violating their personal boundary].
Yes I’d read about this in the other comment but I think it didn’t really register until I saw MSRayne’s reply above.
The reply was enough for something to click in my head, possibly because it was a more concrete explanation, but your explanation made the misunderstanding more explicit to me, so thanks!
I think a miscommunication is happening here, and I think it’s because I used the word “boundary” for two different things (because that’s how it’s used out in the wild).
MSRayne seems to be trying to communicate that any violation of their personal boundary is non-benign. This is not a claim that the OP disagrees with; in fact, it’s a claim that the OP specifically makes.
I think ambigram is trying to talk about violations of the social boundary, and pointing out that those may very well be benign. MSRayne is saying “no, not in my experience,” but afaict MSRayne has also self-identified as being in the set of [people whose personal boundaries already lie outside of the social boundary, such that even things which do not violate the social boundary are already violating their personal boundary].
I think I don’t understand the difference between social and personal boundaries. Like, I read the post, I intellectually recognize the existence of this difference, but I have never noticed social boundaries, only my own personal ones. Presumably because my own are more strict, as you said. At some point I expect I must have absorbed a lot of them from the social milieu—but my social milieu growing up was television and books, and I deeply learned “avoid anything that looks like a situation on TV that made me cringe”, among other things.
Yes I’d read about this in the other comment but I think it didn’t really register until I saw MSRayne’s reply above.
The reply was enough for something to click in my head, possibly because it was a more concrete explanation, but your explanation made the misunderstanding more explicit to me, so thanks!