Dodging your question, I doubt I’d react badly to the situation you describe. I’m British and one can hardly speak British English without saying “fuck”. Also we spend quite a lot of time drunk. If a friend got drunk and started to say “fuck” over and over again I’d probably be worried that something was wrong. I have trouble imagining why I’d be offended.
Above I meant that I’d take offence in response to a direct insult from a stranger, and my memory informs me that I’m likely to take more offence if there are others present, and even more so if there are women.
If the insulter was a woman then I imagine my reaction would be completely different. Mainly confusion and a desire to calm the situation down and get away from the crazy lady as soon as possible.
I’m trying to introspect on why and it’s surprisingly hard. What I’m remembering and imagining is mostly emotional (and moral in the sense of Pinker’s crazy angel), but I’m sure there is a calculation/bluffing/stake raising/status game going on as part of that. Why it seems more important not to back down when there are women present is completely beyond me, but it certainly does. I can feel an essay coming on.
(nods) The reactions you describe aren’t uncommon… and, as you intuit, often have a lot to do with status management. In my experience, learning to recognize the forces at play as they arise in real time is extremely useful.
Dodging your question, I doubt I’d react badly to the situation you describe. I’m British and one can hardly speak British English without saying “fuck”. Also we spend quite a lot of time drunk. If a friend got drunk and started to say “fuck” over and over again I’d probably be worried that something was wrong. I have trouble imagining why I’d be offended.
Above I meant that I’d take offence in response to a direct insult from a stranger, and my memory informs me that I’m likely to take more offence if there are others present, and even more so if there are women.
If the insulter was a woman then I imagine my reaction would be completely different. Mainly confusion and a desire to calm the situation down and get away from the crazy lady as soon as possible.
I’m trying to introspect on why and it’s surprisingly hard. What I’m remembering and imagining is mostly emotional (and moral in the sense of Pinker’s crazy angel), but I’m sure there is a calculation/bluffing/stake raising/status game going on as part of that. Why it seems more important not to back down when there are women present is completely beyond me, but it certainly does. I can feel an essay coming on.
(nods) The reactions you describe aren’t uncommon… and, as you intuit, often have a lot to do with status management. In my experience, learning to recognize the forces at play as they arise in real time is extremely useful.