I think this is getting at an important distinction. The question I would be asking is “what’s the BATNA” (best alternative to a negotiated agreement)? If Bob is going to pay someone to do a task, asking a friend for their cheerful price makes sense. If Bob is otherwise going to do the task himself, or leave it undone, then it doesn’t.
In cases where it is customary to pay a stranger to complete a task (Legal advice, web design, drive to the airport, even baking a cake or DJing a party) asking for someone’s “cheerful price” builds up the relationship because it shows respect for the time the other invested to acquire their skill (or at least acknowledges the inconvenience of the request.
In cases where it is not normal to pay a stranger (turning down their music, sanitizing a package—wtf!, etc.) bringing cash into the relationship damages it
There are a bunch of other things (washing the dishes, picking up lunch, doing laundry) that could fall into either of the above categories, depending on the norms of the group.
I think this is getting at an important distinction. The question I would be asking is “what’s the BATNA” (best alternative to a negotiated agreement)? If Bob is going to pay someone to do a task, asking a friend for their cheerful price makes sense. If Bob is otherwise going to do the task himself, or leave it undone, then it doesn’t.
In cases where it is customary to pay a stranger to complete a task (Legal advice, web design, drive to the airport, even baking a cake or DJing a party) asking for someone’s “cheerful price” builds up the relationship because it shows respect for the time the other invested to acquire their skill (or at least acknowledges the inconvenience of the request.
In cases where it is not normal to pay a stranger (turning down their music, sanitizing a package—wtf!, etc.) bringing cash into the relationship damages it
There are a bunch of other things (washing the dishes, picking up lunch, doing laundry) that could fall into either of the above categories, depending on the norms of the group.