She’s calmed down now, and made an attempt at reinstating her authority over me (shooting down my ideas on another topic, and giving me advice on a specific friendship)
Wow, you’re patient. This behavior would be enough for me to disengage from conversations and erect clear boundaries but you’re presenting it as almost a desired return to a norm.
Yeah, I think it’s tempting when responding to accounts like yours to signal our fierce independence by saying “don’t let her treat you like that! Tell her where to stick it!”. Your course of action—letting her get her way some of the time and patiently helping her when she gets upset about your beliefs, while leaving her her own beliefs—is very likely to be the wise one, especially if you’re financially dependent on her.
Very true. Unfortunately I do not have the financial means to get up and leave, so instead I am attempting to slowly turn a poor relationship into a better one.
Wow, you’re patient. This behavior would be enough for me to disengage from conversations and erect clear boundaries but you’re presenting it as almost a desired return to a norm.
If I had done that, it would have only enraged her. She needed to feel in control again.
Yeah, I think it’s tempting when responding to accounts like yours to signal our fierce independence by saying “don’t let her treat you like that! Tell her where to stick it!”. Your course of action—letting her get her way some of the time and patiently helping her when she gets upset about your beliefs, while leaving her her own beliefs—is very likely to be the wise one, especially if you’re financially dependent on her.
I hope you’re able to be more independent soon!
I think people who need to feel in control of me are the least entitled to feel that way.
Very true. Unfortunately I do not have the financial means to get up and leave, so instead I am attempting to slowly turn a poor relationship into a better one.