I think my partner and I both experience some level of discomfort at knowing that our worldviews are in significant conflict, even though this conflict seems to coexist with a high degree of respect for how the accomplishments of the other. It is unfortunate that we basically have to avoid certain topics of conversation that we both find important and that our emotional reaction to things often differs.
So the program of understanding each other doesn’t make progress. I agree with Alicorn, it’s essential to establish a mode of communication where you can steadily work on disagreements, with the goal of ultimately resolving them in full. The arguments shouldn’t turn into color politics, polarizing and alienating.
A bit of advice, based on my experience, for a long-term conversion strategy:
Work on understanding your own position better, make sure you know why you believe what you believe before trying to convince another person to change one’s mind. Maybe you are wrong.
Make the mode of interaction and your goals clear when you are arguing, distinguish analysis from social interaction.
Educate the person about fundamentals, thus steadily crafting tools for making deeper arguments in specific discussions.
Prefer shifting the discussion towards education about more general mistake that (might have) contributed to a specific mistake or confusion. In long term, it’s more important than resolving a specific problem, and it’s easier on the other person’s feelings, as you are educating on an abstract theme, rather than attacking a conviction.
Don’t argue the objects of emotional attachment, ever. Instead, work on finding an angle of approach (as suggested above, maybe something more fundamental) that allows you to make progress without directly confronting the issue.
Not everyone is going to change, some people are too dim or too shallow or persistently not interested.
So the program of understanding each other doesn’t make progress. I agree with Alicorn, it’s essential to establish a mode of communication where you can steadily work on disagreements, with the goal of ultimately resolving them in full. The arguments shouldn’t turn into color politics, polarizing and alienating.
A bit of advice, based on my experience, for a long-term conversion strategy:
Work on understanding your own position better, make sure you know why you believe what you believe before trying to convince another person to change one’s mind. Maybe you are wrong.
Make the mode of interaction and your goals clear when you are arguing, distinguish analysis from social interaction.
Educate the person about fundamentals, thus steadily crafting tools for making deeper arguments in specific discussions.
Prefer shifting the discussion towards education about more general mistake that (might have) contributed to a specific mistake or confusion. In long term, it’s more important than resolving a specific problem, and it’s easier on the other person’s feelings, as you are educating on an abstract theme, rather than attacking a conviction.
Don’t argue the objects of emotional attachment, ever. Instead, work on finding an angle of approach (as suggested above, maybe something more fundamental) that allows you to make progress without directly confronting the issue.
Not everyone is going to change, some people are too dim or too shallow or persistently not interested.