I am suprised at what you meant by “squinting” at the story. I now wonder if after querying my intuitions, I too quickly cut them apart and analyse their anatomy, leaving them a dead thing. That does not look like the process, your process, of curiosity.
There are two especially hard-hitting concepts in this story: “distraction” and “crucial”. So at this point, I thought for a while about “distraction”.
In my notes, I seem to be sort of turning the concept around and around, as though trying to see all the sides of it, or to memorize its shape. I asked a lot of questions, such as “Where does distraction come from?” and, “Is it something with a positive force, like a draw to think about something else? Or is it merely an absence, a failure to focus on the intended subject?”
The main point of these questions was to activate my curiosity and familiarize myself with the sensation of it. Some questions burned brighter than others. By dwelling on this “squinting” process, I learned to feel my desire for understanding as it interacted with my thoughts around “distraction”.
I’m wondering if there are analogues of physical necessity. Perhaps mathematical necessity. There’s a particular feeling you have when you get a proof-idea, but it doesn’t seem quite as forceful to me as considering the constraints I can feel when considering how to get up from my chair. Though I think that’s focusing on the wrong thing. Maybe the feeling you get when you look at a theorem and think that it could be no other way? I’m trying to think of examples which feel something like the sense of physical necessity and I’m not getting anything near as strong.
What about social versions? Well, I think there are two senses that might qualify: the sense that you’re acting out a role, and the sense of social pressure distorting your thoughts. I think the latter is a closer analogue as it feels more like my thoughts are moving on rails carved through social forces. These thoughts feel like they’re weakly coupled to my world model but strongly associated with people I respect, movements I identify with etc.
Oh, that reminds me of another possible analogue: actions or thoughts that fit your identity. This might even generalize the social role/pressure options. Example: somtimes investigate things that contradict my world-view because the idea that it would be unvirtuous not to do so sucks me in. And that sure looks like it is about what kind of person I view myself as.
Side note: I wonder what life would be like if every action was guided by necessity. Would it feel like being in a flow state? Those states feel like following a pointer to the next possible thought or action, constantly. But following arrows isn’t the same thing as being constrained, so I think not.
I am suprised at what you meant by “squinting” at the story. I now wonder if after querying my intuitions, I too quickly cut them apart and analyse their anatomy, leaving them a dead thing. That does not look like the process, your process, of curiosity.
I’m wondering if there are analogues of physical necessity. Perhaps mathematical necessity. There’s a particular feeling you have when you get a proof-idea, but it doesn’t seem quite as forceful to me as considering the constraints I can feel when considering how to get up from my chair. Though I think that’s focusing on the wrong thing. Maybe the feeling you get when you look at a theorem and think that it could be no other way? I’m trying to think of examples which feel something like the sense of physical necessity and I’m not getting anything near as strong.
What about social versions? Well, I think there are two senses that might qualify: the sense that you’re acting out a role, and the sense of social pressure distorting your thoughts. I think the latter is a closer analogue as it feels more like my thoughts are moving on rails carved through social forces. These thoughts feel like they’re weakly coupled to my world model but strongly associated with people I respect, movements I identify with etc.
Oh, that reminds me of another possible analogue: actions or thoughts that fit your identity. This might even generalize the social role/pressure options. Example: somtimes investigate things that contradict my world-view because the idea that it would be unvirtuous not to do so sucks me in. And that sure looks like it is about what kind of person I view myself as.
Side note: I wonder what life would be like if every action was guided by necessity. Would it feel like being in a flow state? Those states feel like following a pointer to the next possible thought or action, constantly. But following arrows isn’t the same thing as being constrained, so I think not.