sruch

• sruch 20 May 2011 20:55 UTC

  0 points

  in reply to: DavidM’s comment on: Med­i­ta­tion, in­sight, and ra­tio­nal­ity. (Part 2 of 3)

  Ok an update on my experiences: a few days ago I sat and had less wandering and odd visuals, and then I had a strong tingling sensation starting at my neck and running down my body. Like shivering but no actual body movement—stronger than my previous tingling and different. This one travelled through the body. This happened over and over about 10-15 times. I was noting things like happy, calm, excited. It was pretty enjoyable, almost sensual. I was not aware meditating can produce these odd sensations. It’s very interesting. Since then I have had a small amount of that but not nearly as much. Also I am easily irritated afterwards and am now a bit anxious. I am also noticing small jerks and stutters in my breath. It’s chunky when I focus intently on it. Also getting these things where I suddenly realize “something” happened like I fell asleep and woke suddenly. Also today i was looking at myself in the mirror for a long time and then it was like my face looked frightening to me and there was actual fear. Very interesting. I was skeptical but this is producing bizarre effects and I’m bored so I’ll see where this goes and keep investgating.

• sruch 16 May 2011 13:33 UTC

  0 points

  in reply to: DavidM’s comment on: Med­i­ta­tion, in­sight, and ra­tio­nal­ity. (Part 2 of 3)

  I can always see extremely fast vibration in the visual field, like dozens per second at least (maybe hundreds—too fast to tell). It’s like a tv station showing snow on an empty channel. That’s what I see in the graininess all the time.

  Now, though I am beginning to very faintly see a slower but still very fast vibration overlaying all of the graininess. I see this sometimes but not always. It’s very fast—faster than I can label it. Maybe 10-20 per second. In this case do you just label as fast as possible and try to keep up?

• sruch 15 May 2011 23:51 UTC

  0 points

  in reply to: DavidM’s comment on: Med­i­ta­tion, in­sight, and ra­tio­nal­ity. (Part 2 of 3)

  Meds are for treatment resistant mild depression and social anxiety. But I think the doc may suspect bipolar ii or similar since the lamictal is new. Will report back on this new method.

• sruch 14 May 2011 21:19 UTC

  0 points

  in reply to: DavidM’s comment on: Med­i­ta­tion, in­sight, and ra­tio­nal­ity. (Part 2 of 3)

  What do you mean by “nothing”? Absense of a tingle? Absense of all physical sensation?

  Not really sure. It’s moving to fast to tell. The nothing part seems different from neutral awake mode though.

  Your concentration is relatively good, and when it gets to a certain point, it produces this effect, but the effect distracts you, your concentration falls apart, and the effect disappears

  This might be the case. Will expect it next time so it won’t break my concentration.

  I assume that if you’re in stage 2, you’re in the beginning, because you didn’t report any mood or emotional effects. You did report some bizarre visualizations, which is definitely stage 2-esque (especially because of their bizarreness), but for now I’m attributing that to being sleepy. But it could just be the way that stage 2 manifests for you, especially if you don’t typically have imagery like that.

  Yeah I don’t get that type of imagery, plus I was fairly uncomfortable it the position I was in—legs hurt.

  Do you feel any different when you’re not meditating? Tingles? Weird visualizations? How’s your mood and energy level?

  No visualizations outside of meditating. Mood was kind of bad last night. My head feels like it’s buzzing at a high pitch and I feel like I can almost hear it. Also, another thing I’ve noticed all my life is that my entire visual field is grainy (like millions of pixels or points that seem to change and pulsate), particularly in the dark but in light as well (except if it’s really bright). l always thought this was some artifact of how the retina works, like I’m seeing individual rod/​cone firings, or maybe registering individual photons. But I notice this in absolute total darkness too, so maybe it’s something else. But anyway I am noticing this effect more often and it is vibratory in nature—seems to pulse really fast. If I close my eyes the visual field explodes with this graininess. I’m trying to observe it more today.

  Should be noted that I take Zoloft and Lamictal in case those are influencing any of this.

• sruch 14 May 2011 0:10 UTC

  0 points

  in reply to: DavidM’s comment on: Med­i­ta­tion, in­sight, and ra­tio­nal­ity. (Part 2 of 3)

  I would probably say that the sensations are slightly pleasant, but yet slightly foreign and odd. Focus seems better before this happens. Definitely better than when I start. Seems to fluctuate maybe 10 to 20 per second. I can sort of describe it as something then nothing alternating, with the something being stronger. I can probably observe it better next time if this is useful. Its almost too fast. You seem to be saying that these might be comprised of even smaller parts, since you said its a good place to look. Are actual vibrations different?

• sruch 13 May 2011 16:20 UTC

  1 point

  on: Med­i­ta­tion, in­sight, and ra­tio­nal­ity. (Part 2 of 3)

  First time poster here. Decided to try this about a week ago. Been doing this about 30-45 minutes a day since then. Here’s my experience:

  First 2 days: Did the breathing and labeling, not too hard to concentrate but got distracted and labeled the distractions. No vibrations. Not sure what you mean by that exactly.

  Mid-week until today: At about 20 minutes in, I notice a couple of things going on. I start to sort of forget what I am supposed to say when labeling or forget to label altogether. I will get confused and not know that I am supposed to say “out” for example. I will know I am supposed to say something, but I forget what it is. Then I remember and come back to it. Also, I start getting spontaneous imagery and/​or thoughts coming in. Like 3 McNuggets with a skewer through them—WTF. Then today I had one where it was a guy’s face with a giant hole in it, and an arm was coming out of his ear and you could see the lower half through the giant hole. Or I would notice I was thinking some series of thoughts instead of meditating, then remember I was meditating and go back to it.

  Last 2 days: Same as above but now at around 25-30 minutes in I will get a sensation kind of like your foot falling asleep, but in my whole body and not unpleasant. Vaguely like shivering but no actual body movement. That may last a second or two. Maybe this will happen 2 or 3 times in a session. Still not sure what you mean by vibrations, although the body sensation was kind of vibratory, like needles all over poking rapidly but not in a painful way. Is that what you are talking about? I labeled it “that”.

  After I stop, I feel a bit weird, like the world is brighter or more vibrant in a way. Hard to explain.

  Anyway, that’s my story so far. Any thoughts on that? Am I progressing or just starting to fall asleep? Some of it has a kind of dreamlike quality.