There will be times when fear is telling you something correct and actionable, and should be heeded.
There will be many, many times when fear is telling you lies.
This is one of many opportunities to practice telling the difference.
I hope that math gives you a chance to see yourself overcome a personal challenge—observation shapes self-perception, and I think it’s better to perceive oneself as capable of overcoming hard things than otherwise.
The funny thing about numeracy is that it does double duty in the modern era: First, it scares away so many people that competition is reduced for certain jobs, and in turn, compensation tends to be higher for them.
Second and much more relevantly, slogging through calculus teaches you to notice certain categories of problem and form expectations about how their answers should look. You don’t have to keep on doing calculus once you’ve figured out how to use it, just like you don’t have to keep on taking driver’s ed class once you’ve gotten your license. But having a background in higher math—get through basic calculus and also give formal logic a shot; it’s a radically different flavor and can be much more palatable for some—can make it feel natural and obvious to stay on the correct side of compound interest at all times, which is critical for comfortably sustaining oneself in the current world. Money is math; financial instruments are math. Salary negotiation, like “should I push for higher base compensation or a bigger sign-on bonus or stock, and how does this depend on the type of stock”, is a form of math problem that tricks people into choosing lower over higher total compensation very frequently.
I hope that you can choose the path for yourself where you do not have to live in fear, nor wonder how much better things could have been if you’d just been a little braver. And if you want to commiserate about math, you’re welcome to mail me or whatever—it was my least favorite subject in school and I’ve failed many classes in it over the years, but the tech for finding interesting snippets of it and knitting them together into better general knowledge has improved vastly since I was in university.
If the structure turns out to be long-lived, keep an eye on that plastic sheeting, and pull it off as soon as you start to see it decaying from sun damage. It’s the kind of stuff that will fill a yard with hard-to-pick-up nastiness if left to the ravages of nature for too long.
If it’s the type of plastic designed for greenhouses, it’s likely to hold up much better. A scrap of pool liner or pond liner would make a good replacement. In an urban area, I’d keep an eye out for those corrugated plastic yard signs and staple them onto the roof like shingles.