Here’s a piece of advice I haven’t seen mentioned on this topic: people are typically irrational about sex, and you can make yourself an appealing partner to a minority of people who aren’t being “well served” by the general population simply by being extra open-minded. In short, I’m going to advocate exploring kink spaces.
First, cultivate the aliefs that there is zero shame associated with consensual sexual activity of any kind, and that there is no space for sex-specific morality in your code of ethics. The slogan “everyone owns exactly one body” is a good start.
If you’ve got this in your head, hopefully you’ll want to do just about anything your partner wants you to. The attitude to cultivate is to be “good, giving and game”.
Once you’ve got the mind-set right and done back-ground reading, you can start looking for kink meet-ups and groups in your area. The really nice thing for you is that kinksters are basically sex nerds: everything is talked about explicitly, negotiated, scheduled, double-checked, etc. There’s worlds of hand-holding at every step.
I could be just plain wrong about this, but my belief is that sexual tastes can be “acquired” in the way you can learn to like strong cheeses, silent films, whatever. So have a go at acquiring this taste—because I think it’d prove useful.
I also think that people who hang out in kink spaces are more likely to have non mainstream sexual tastes. You are, I would think, more likely to find women who are really keen on fat guys (these women do exist) in these spaces. It’s been my experience that in kinky and similar communities (e.g. the poly community) people (both men and women) who are not conventionally attractive are more likely to be sexually successful than they would be outside these communities.
Here’s a piece of advice I haven’t seen mentioned on this topic: people are typically irrational about sex, and you can make yourself an appealing partner to a minority of people who aren’t being “well served” by the general population simply by being extra open-minded. In short, I’m going to advocate exploring kink spaces.
First, cultivate the aliefs that there is zero shame associated with consensual sexual activity of any kind, and that there is no space for sex-specific morality in your code of ethics. The slogan “everyone owns exactly one body” is a good start.
If you’ve got this in your head, hopefully you’ll want to do just about anything your partner wants you to. The attitude to cultivate is to be “good, giving and game”.
Once you’ve got the mind-set right and done back-ground reading, you can start looking for kink meet-ups and groups in your area. The really nice thing for you is that kinksters are basically sex nerds: everything is talked about explicitly, negotiated, scheduled, double-checked, etc. There’s worlds of hand-holding at every step.
I could be just plain wrong about this, but my belief is that sexual tastes can be “acquired” in the way you can learn to like strong cheeses, silent films, whatever. So have a go at acquiring this taste—because I think it’d prove useful.
I also think that people who hang out in kink spaces are more likely to have non mainstream sexual tastes. You are, I would think, more likely to find women who are really keen on fat guys (these women do exist) in these spaces. It’s been my experience that in kinky and similar communities (e.g. the poly community) people (both men and women) who are not conventionally attractive are more likely to be sexually successful than they would be outside these communities.