The comment of mine you link is a pretty good description of my break with Classic Poly on this issue. I don’t usually use the exact word “ownership”, but: he’s mine! I liked it so I put a ring on it! I value having the option to transition to monogamy if I want! Mine mine mine! Saying that I was a prompt for realizing that “jealousy conflates love with ownership” makes it sound like you think I don’t love my primary, or that you’re confused about whether I think he’s mine (mine mine mine mine), or that I must be plagued by intolerable jealousy, or… something. I’m puzzled.
Sorry, I was unclear. Or maybe I misunderstood you. Or both. Actually, in what sense he is “yours”, is not clear to me. Certainly it does not look like you are restricting the choices he makes, including his choice of an extra romantic partner, or at least not by much. My best guess is that you two get preferential and unfettered access to each other… Anyway, not sure if this is getting anywhere.
The comment of mine you link is a pretty good description of my break with Classic Poly on this issue. I don’t usually use the exact word “ownership”, but: he’s mine! I liked it so I put a ring on it! I value having the option to transition to monogamy if I want! Mine mine mine! Saying that I was a prompt for realizing that “jealousy conflates love with ownership” makes it sound like you think I don’t love my primary, or that you’re confused about whether I think he’s mine (mine mine mine mine), or that I must be plagued by intolerable jealousy, or… something. I’m puzzled.
Oy. Didn’t mean anything like that.
Sorry, I was unclear. Or maybe I misunderstood you. Or both. Actually, in what sense he is “yours”, is not clear to me. Certainly it does not look like you are restricting the choices he makes, including his choice of an extra romantic partner, or at least not by much. My best guess is that you two get preferential and unfettered access to each other… Anyway, not sure if this is getting anywhere.