Not wanting to disagree or downplay, I just want to offer a different way to think about it.
When somebody says I don’t exist—and this definitely happens—to me, it all depends on what they’re trying to do with it. If they’re saying “you don’t exist, so I don’t need to worry about harming you because the category of people who would be harmed is empty”, then yeah I feel hurt and offended and have the urge to speak up, probably loudly. But if they’re just saying when trying to analyze reality, like, “I don’t think people like that exist, because my model doesn’t allow for them”, the first feeling I get is delight. I get to surprise you! You get to learn a new thing! Your model is gonna break and flex and fit new things into it!
Not wanting to disagree or downplay, I just want to offer a different way to think about it.
When somebody says I don’t exist—and this definitely happens—to me, it all depends on what they’re trying to do with it. If they’re saying “you don’t exist, so I don’t need to worry about harming you because the category of people who would be harmed is empty”, then yeah I feel hurt and offended and have the urge to speak up, probably loudly. But if they’re just saying when trying to analyze reality, like, “I don’t think people like that exist, because my model doesn’t allow for them”, the first feeling I get is delight. I get to surprise you! You get to learn a new thing! Your model is gonna break and flex and fit new things into it!
Maybe I’m overly optimistic about people.
Or maybe you’re just the right amount of optimistic for the people you’ve run into, and I’m just less lucky. =P