I generally find interacting with people (NT or otherwise) to be approximately as tiring as programming a computer; it’s fun for short periods of time and a serious effort for long periods of time, though still often rewarding in the latter case. I almost answered this question by saying that social interaction wasn’t tiring, but reevaluated after realizing that I’ve just grown used to it; other people’s behavior is impossible to explain unless they find social interaction significantly less tiring than I do.
I’m not a complete introvert, but I do lean in that general direction.
For me, it depends on the individual’s communication style and how well I know them. If I have to put a lot of effort into deciphering what they’re saying or phrasing my words carefully so that they understand me, I’ll tire quickly, whether they’re NT or not. (It’s more common for auties to have communication styles that I find easy to parse, though.) Interacting with most NTs is draining but not badly so, but I also know one or two NTs where interacting with them is actually energizing for me.
I haven’t made any special effort at being normal, though. I’ve focused on finding the best ways to use my strengths, rather than trying to find ways to mitigate my weaknesses.
My natural tendency in social situations is to process things rather thoroughly, which is more work but tends to lead to a better understanding of what’s going on (modulo the fact that some kinds of interactions don’t make sense to me and thus are nearly impossible to integrate into my model). I could, in theory, rearrange my habits so that I was able to interact for longer stretches without getting tired, but at the cost of some of my perceptiveness, and I’m not interested in doing that.
As a matter of fact, I have a friend with ASD, to a significant enough degree that it’s barely possible to talk to him for a couple of minutes without realizing he has some sort of social disorder, who somehow has managed to become the most successful and prolific social networker I know. It may have helped that one of his primary obsessive focuses was an interest that many other people share (he practically ran the music scene on college campus,) but the degree of social success he’s achieved in spite of his disadvantages is completely beyond my ability to explain. He’d make an interesting psychological case study.
No, I expect such cases are fairly rare. At least for all situations which are with multiple NTs. There are some NTs that can act like ‘real people’ if you catch them by themselves! ;)
Do you know of any people on the AS spectrum who can interact with NTs without it being tiring?
I generally find interacting with people (NT or otherwise) to be approximately as tiring as programming a computer; it’s fun for short periods of time and a serious effort for long periods of time, though still often rewarding in the latter case. I almost answered this question by saying that social interaction wasn’t tiring, but reevaluated after realizing that I’ve just grown used to it; other people’s behavior is impossible to explain unless they find social interaction significantly less tiring than I do.
I’m not a complete introvert, but I do lean in that general direction.
For me, it depends on the individual’s communication style and how well I know them. If I have to put a lot of effort into deciphering what they’re saying or phrasing my words carefully so that they understand me, I’ll tire quickly, whether they’re NT or not. (It’s more common for auties to have communication styles that I find easy to parse, though.) Interacting with most NTs is draining but not badly so, but I also know one or two NTs where interacting with them is actually energizing for me.
I haven’t made any special effort at being normal, though. I’ve focused on finding the best ways to use my strengths, rather than trying to find ways to mitigate my weaknesses.
Could you expand on that?
My natural tendency in social situations is to process things rather thoroughly, which is more work but tends to lead to a better understanding of what’s going on (modulo the fact that some kinds of interactions don’t make sense to me and thus are nearly impossible to integrate into my model). I could, in theory, rearrange my habits so that I was able to interact for longer stretches without getting tired, but at the cost of some of my perceptiveness, and I’m not interested in doing that.
As a matter of fact, I have a friend with ASD, to a significant enough degree that it’s barely possible to talk to him for a couple of minutes without realizing he has some sort of social disorder, who somehow has managed to become the most successful and prolific social networker I know. It may have helped that one of his primary obsessive focuses was an interest that many other people share (he practically ran the music scene on college campus,) but the degree of social success he’s achieved in spite of his disadvantages is completely beyond my ability to explain. He’d make an interesting psychological case study.
No, I expect such cases are fairly rare. At least for all situations which are with multiple NTs. There are some NTs that can act like ‘real people’ if you catch them by themselves! ;)
I can interact with NTs (one at a time), as long as they are nice people, and not get tired, but I’m a rare breed (autistic extrovert).