Sorry, this I realize is entirely off topic. Where should I move the discussion to? Ppl can take it to email with me if they like (cingulate2000@gmail.com).
Hmm… musing again on the psycho-social development of children and the role of adult approval. Scott suggested that being rewarded by adults for academic development may have impeded his social development.
I wonder if there are any social psychology studies in which a child is chosen at random to be favored by an adult authority figure, an what happens to that child’s interactions with peers, and self perception. I wonder if gender has been used as a variable. Anyone have any references?
Personally, I have long asserted that the main reason I put any effort into school was to gain the approval and attention of my male teachers. My mother pointed out that I loved all my male teachers and usually despised the female ones, and thus did much better under male tutelage, even switching me into a male teacher’s classroom in 4th grade after a ‘personality conflict’ with a female one. Now, for a woman, learning how to gain the approval of male authority figures is a transitive skill from childhood to adulthood… The girls at the lab I worked at in Germany joked that I was ‘Herr Doctors kleine Freundin,’ because he showed a disproportionately great interest in my relatively unremarkable project and would always pop into my room to chat (an apparently aberrant behavior for this very serious man).
Now, for boys, learning how best to get the approval of female authority figures doesn’t seem to translate into adulthood. Maybe there is a subtle sexual tension between young female students and their male teachers (hence crushes and the like) but not for boys and their female teachers, who they might view more like mommies than girlfriends. Thus, at some point boys are going to need to break away from the adult-approval schematic if they are to be romantically successful and not turn into man-children. The psycho-social-sexual development of children seems very interesting to me, and I would be very grateful to be directed to some thoughtful literature and/or studies on the topic.
Sorry, this I realize is entirely off topic. Where should I move the discussion to? Ppl can take it to email with me if they like (cingulate2000@gmail.com).
Hmm… musing again on the psycho-social development of children and the role of adult approval. Scott suggested that being rewarded by adults for academic development may have impeded his social development.
I wonder if there are any social psychology studies in which a child is chosen at random to be favored by an adult authority figure, an what happens to that child’s interactions with peers, and self perception. I wonder if gender has been used as a variable. Anyone have any references?
Personally, I have long asserted that the main reason I put any effort into school was to gain the approval and attention of my male teachers. My mother pointed out that I loved all my male teachers and usually despised the female ones, and thus did much better under male tutelage, even switching me into a male teacher’s classroom in 4th grade after a ‘personality conflict’ with a female one. Now, for a woman, learning how to gain the approval of male authority figures is a transitive skill from childhood to adulthood… The girls at the lab I worked at in Germany joked that I was ‘Herr Doctors kleine Freundin,’ because he showed a disproportionately great interest in my relatively unremarkable project and would always pop into my room to chat (an apparently aberrant behavior for this very serious man).
Now, for boys, learning how best to get the approval of female authority figures doesn’t seem to translate into adulthood. Maybe there is a subtle sexual tension between young female students and their male teachers (hence crushes and the like) but not for boys and their female teachers, who they might view more like mommies than girlfriends. Thus, at some point boys are going to need to break away from the adult-approval schematic if they are to be romantically successful and not turn into man-children. The psycho-social-sexual development of children seems very interesting to me, and I would be very grateful to be directed to some thoughtful literature and/or studies on the topic.