If it’s a question of short term motivation to finish grinding through a project, the answer is: “Use stimulants”.
If it’s a question of long term motivation...you might want to re-evaluate whether you actually prefer doing this, or are getting hung up on the notion that you aught to prefer this.
While I can do fine without doing this specific project, my problem is doing anything productive in general. I need to work to support myself. I need to work to support those who cannot support themselves.
I don’t actually like doing this. The issue isn’t that I think I ought to. It’s that I think I can. I’ve enjoyed programming in the past. I’ve spent a week doing almost nothing but eating sleeping and programming, entirely for my own enjoyment. As I am now, I dislike doing anything productive. If I can’t change, I’m doomed to have a job I hate. If I can enjoy it though, I can have a good life.
Well then do something you enjoy that’s not productive right now, but can become so if you try enough to raise your skill at it. Every ability I can boast of so far has been picked up along the way as I was avoiding tasks I ought to have worked on in favor of leisure activities that still required some sort of skill to be performed well. Even procrastination can be useful if your chosen method of procrastinating earns you abilities for which someone, somewhere is willing to pay you.
That is, as long as you don’t refuse to enjoy something on the grounds that it might turn out to be lucrative one day, and therefore it’s not proper enjoyment.
It’s not that I’m not skilled at the things I like. It’s that the stuff I want to do is stuff like reading and playing videogames. It’s not something you can feasibly make a living doing. Also, I’m pretty sure that the few actual jobs there are in areas like that still end up pretty unpleasant.
It’s not that I’m not skilled at the things I like.
Huh. I never doubted that for one second, nor said anything about it.
It’s that the stuff I want to do is stuff like reading and playing videogames. It’s not something you can feasibly make a living doing. Also, I’m pretty sure that the few actual jobs there are in areas like that still end up pretty unpleasant.
Oh. Oh, it makes sense now. Well, to tell you the truth, I too started with reading and playing videogames, and I’ve progressed to writing and making stuff for videogames. Low entry barriers to my respective means of expression helped a lot, too. Do you have any sort of hobby that you’d like to take to the next level, so to speak?
I’ve tried writing, but I can never get more than a few pages. I can come up with good ideas, but I’ll never be able to write the requisite million words before I can get to the good writing.
As for making stuff for videogames, that’s pretty much what this project is. I’m making a graphics program for non-euclidean geometry. Imagine portal, but with portals that look like this, or at least they would if you embedded them in four-dimensional space and looked at a cross-section, and several other interesting defects in space.
I’ve also tried modeling. I’ve had some fun with it with POV-Ray, but I never got the hang of Blender.
I don’t actually like doing this. The issue isn’t that I think I ought to. It’s that I think I can.
What I’m hearing is that you don’t enjoy “work” in general, but you need a way to support yourself and you think this is the least unpleasant job—correct?
I’ve enjoyed programming in the past. I’ve spent a week doing almost nothing but eating sleeping and programming, entirely for my own enjoyment. As I am now, I dislike doing anything productive
So...why is that? Was it always that way, or did something make you that way? Do you just have a lack of motivation for non-interesting things in general?
What I’m hearing is that you don’t enjoy “work” in general, but you need a way to support yourself and you think this is the least unpleasant job—correct?
Correct.
So...why is that?
I don’t know.
Do you just have a lack of motivation for non-interesting things in general?
I’m not motivated to do most things, if that’s what you mean. Something being interesting can be a motivation. It doesn’t seem like it’s motivating me to do this project right now though.
Was it always that way, or did something make you that way?
If this is an enduring trait for you, the way I see it you have two options:
1) Treat it as a disorder—go to a psychologist, let them test for ADHD, schizoid, anhedonia, and other motivation effecting disorders. There are lots of relatively safe drugs that can give you motivation. If you’ve got some sort of ambition in programming or a similarly taxing field, this is probably the best route.
2) Learn to live with less money, and find a way to not “work”. There are multiple ways to do this—the hard way is to be self-employed and/or attempt to create some passive income streams. If you’re an “I’m only motivated when its fun and self initiated” kind of person, this could work.
An easier route is to do something a bit less intellectual than programming. If you want to get low-effort money, you can seriously do better than programming. Lots of jobs require very little in the way of motivation. Walking people’s dogs pays surprisingly well if you live in the right area, since you can charge a reasonable rate per dog, and then walk a bunch of dogs at once. If you’re physically adept, you can get a job which forces motivation by putting you in high-pressure situation—firefighting, ER, etc.
Look for jobs which are physical, or jobs which involve bursts of activity with lots of waiting in between, or jobs which allow you to passively sit at a desk and read comics or something until a customer comes.
Programming and similar “creative” jobs require a person to operate largely on their own initiative—if you don’t have much initiative, why not just do something else? Just because you’re smart doesn’t mean you have to do an intellectual job.
It doesn’t seem like it was always that way. At least, I’ve spent large amounts of time on a single project before. I do tend to get very unproductive during Summer.
1) Treat it as a disorder
I have Asperger’s Syndrome.
2) Learn to live with less money, and find a way to not “work”.
I plan on being a professional donor. I can live with less money. Unfortunately, there are others who will not live if I have less money.
Just because you’re smart doesn’t mean you have to do an intellectual job.
I have some resistance to doing a job like that. I think it’s because I just want to create something. Somehow, this doesn’t seem to do a lot to translate into me actually creating something.
If it’s a question of short term motivation to finish grinding through a project, the answer is: “Use stimulants”.
If it’s a question of long term motivation...you might want to re-evaluate whether you actually prefer doing this, or are getting hung up on the notion that you aught to prefer this.
While I can do fine without doing this specific project, my problem is doing anything productive in general. I need to work to support myself. I need to work to support those who cannot support themselves.
I don’t actually like doing this. The issue isn’t that I think I ought to. It’s that I think I can. I’ve enjoyed programming in the past. I’ve spent a week doing almost nothing but eating sleeping and programming, entirely for my own enjoyment. As I am now, I dislike doing anything productive. If I can’t change, I’m doomed to have a job I hate. If I can enjoy it though, I can have a good life.
Well then do something you enjoy that’s not productive right now, but can become so if you try enough to raise your skill at it. Every ability I can boast of so far has been picked up along the way as I was avoiding tasks I ought to have worked on in favor of leisure activities that still required some sort of skill to be performed well. Even procrastination can be useful if your chosen method of procrastinating earns you abilities for which someone, somewhere is willing to pay you.
That is, as long as you don’t refuse to enjoy something on the grounds that it might turn out to be lucrative one day, and therefore it’s not proper enjoyment.
It’s not that I’m not skilled at the things I like. It’s that the stuff I want to do is stuff like reading and playing videogames. It’s not something you can feasibly make a living doing. Also, I’m pretty sure that the few actual jobs there are in areas like that still end up pretty unpleasant.
Huh. I never doubted that for one second, nor said anything about it.
Oh. Oh, it makes sense now. Well, to tell you the truth, I too started with reading and playing videogames, and I’ve progressed to writing and making stuff for videogames. Low entry barriers to my respective means of expression helped a lot, too. Do you have any sort of hobby that you’d like to take to the next level, so to speak?
I’ve tried writing, but I can never get more than a few pages. I can come up with good ideas, but I’ll never be able to write the requisite million words before I can get to the good writing.
As for making stuff for videogames, that’s pretty much what this project is. I’m making a graphics program for non-euclidean geometry. Imagine portal, but with portals that look like this, or at least they would if you embedded them in four-dimensional space and looked at a cross-section, and several other interesting defects in space.
I’ve also tried modeling. I’ve had some fun with it with POV-Ray, but I never got the hang of Blender.
What I’m hearing is that you don’t enjoy “work” in general, but you need a way to support yourself and you think this is the least unpleasant job—correct?
So...why is that? Was it always that way, or did something make you that way? Do you just have a lack of motivation for non-interesting things in general?
Correct.
I don’t know.
I’m not motivated to do most things, if that’s what you mean. Something being interesting can be a motivation. It doesn’t seem like it’s motivating me to do this project right now though.
You didn’t answer
If this is an enduring trait for you, the way I see it you have two options:
1) Treat it as a disorder—go to a psychologist, let them test for ADHD, schizoid, anhedonia, and other motivation effecting disorders. There are lots of relatively safe drugs that can give you motivation. If you’ve got some sort of ambition in programming or a similarly taxing field, this is probably the best route.
2) Learn to live with less money, and find a way to not “work”. There are multiple ways to do this—the hard way is to be self-employed and/or attempt to create some passive income streams. If you’re an “I’m only motivated when its fun and self initiated” kind of person, this could work.
An easier route is to do something a bit less intellectual than programming. If you want to get low-effort money, you can seriously do better than programming. Lots of jobs require very little in the way of motivation. Walking people’s dogs pays surprisingly well if you live in the right area, since you can charge a reasonable rate per dog, and then walk a bunch of dogs at once. If you’re physically adept, you can get a job which forces motivation by putting you in high-pressure situation—firefighting, ER, etc.
Look for jobs which are physical, or jobs which involve bursts of activity with lots of waiting in between, or jobs which allow you to passively sit at a desk and read comics or something until a customer comes.
Programming and similar “creative” jobs require a person to operate largely on their own initiative—if you don’t have much initiative, why not just do something else? Just because you’re smart doesn’t mean you have to do an intellectual job.
It doesn’t seem like it was always that way. At least, I’ve spent large amounts of time on a single project before. I do tend to get very unproductive during Summer.
I have Asperger’s Syndrome.
I plan on being a professional donor. I can live with less money. Unfortunately, there are others who will not live if I have less money.
I have some resistance to doing a job like that. I think it’s because I just want to create something. Somehow, this doesn’t seem to do a lot to translate into me actually creating something.
Depending on the extent which you are willing to tamper with yourself to upregulate motivation, here are some things to look into:
adderall, ritalin, vyvanse, modafinil, nicotine, caffeine, piracetam, CDPCholine...