I’m slowly accepting that my ADHD sucks to inhabit, but that it is objectively working and my feeling that it is a secret superpower isn’t entirely cope. Certainly I miss deadlines and raise my advisor’s blood pressure, but at this point I’ve got multiple CVPR papers.
The question is: do my research results trace back to me involuntarily exploring the beautiful research directions, even when I am trying very hard to focus on the work in front of me, that I am expected/required to be doing?
Or, do I have innate ability that is being held back by ADHD, and I would be far more successful if I could just have self control? I think fear of this possibility contributes an unhealthy level of ambition: if I’m successful enough, it wouldn’t leave room above for the “far more successful” version of me without ADHD to eclipse me.
I’m slowly accepting that my ADHD sucks to inhabit, but that it is objectively working and my feeling that it is a secret superpower isn’t entirely cope. Certainly I miss deadlines and raise my advisor’s blood pressure, but at this point I’ve got multiple CVPR papers.
The question is: do my research results trace back to me involuntarily exploring the beautiful research directions, even when I am trying very hard to focus on the work in front of me, that I am expected/required to be doing?
Or, do I have innate ability that is being held back by ADHD, and I would be far more successful if I could just have self control? I think fear of this possibility contributes an unhealthy level of ambition: if I’m successful enough, it wouldn’t leave room above for the “far more successful” version of me without ADHD to eclipse me.