(the way this is actually handled in most in-person spaces I know of is that there is a natural progression where strangers are expected to show each other politeness, and people that know each other well are more likely to spar with each other. I think this is in fact good, and part of the problem of online spaces is that there’s a lot of ambiguity of who knows each other well enough to spar and have it be net-positive rather than just causing everyone to dig in their heels and get frustrated)
This is interesting, most especially because it’s mutable, situational, and different for different participants. There’s not a policy about the topic or space, there’s a meta-policy that you lurk long enough to understand the fine-grained expectations about which sub-topics are accepted to be discussed by which styles.
This matches my experiences with good in-person discussions (incuding business, technical, and personal friendship groups): some points are ok (and expected) to directly contradict if you disagree, some others should be questioned and expanded, but not rejected, and still others are pretty much out of bounds for the current group. And which sub-point is in which group depends BOTH on who you are and what you think.
I’m not certain that this translates well to public online discussions. I don’t know if we should TRY, even. But it should make us aware that this is harder than just selecting rules we think we want—it’s figuring out what behaviors to encourage and discourage, in what situations. It’s way more detailed than “pick an island or a subreddit that has rules you like”.
(the way this is actually handled in most in-person spaces I know of is that there is a natural progression where strangers are expected to show each other politeness, and people that know each other well are more likely to spar with each other. I think this is in fact good, and part of the problem of online spaces is that there’s a lot of ambiguity of who knows each other well enough to spar and have it be net-positive rather than just causing everyone to dig in their heels and get frustrated)
This is interesting, most especially because it’s mutable, situational, and different for different participants. There’s not a policy about the topic or space, there’s a meta-policy that you lurk long enough to understand the fine-grained expectations about which sub-topics are accepted to be discussed by which styles.
This matches my experiences with good in-person discussions (incuding business, technical, and personal friendship groups): some points are ok (and expected) to directly contradict if you disagree, some others should be questioned and expanded, but not rejected, and still others are pretty much out of bounds for the current group. And which sub-point is in which group depends BOTH on who you are and what you think.
I’m not certain that this translates well to public online discussions. I don’t know if we should TRY, even. But it should make us aware that this is harder than just selecting rules we think we want—it’s figuring out what behaviors to encourage and discourage, in what situations. It’s way more detailed than “pick an island or a subreddit that has rules you like”.