(Point of order, this probably makes more sense as a comment rather than an answer.)
Nobody, who really operates from a should-less-frame says “we shouldn’t use should”. They rather say things like “If you think in terms of should it makes you suffer. While I’m okay with you suffering, using a different frame would allow you to suffer less”.
I agree with this. I also think that once one learns to think in that new mode, bringing back “should” as a shorthand doesn’t necessarily cause any problems. As someone who doesn’t currently avoid “should”, I am OK with writing things such as “the claim that you should taboo ‘should’” as a shorthand for a claim that there are benefits from doing so—despite the irony.
I think there’s a danger when you see the relationship of nonviolent communication as one about tabooing should. People who just exchange their vocabulary for NVC words without changing their intended meaning don’t get very far and generally give NVC a bad name.
I only meant to say (and only said) that the claim was associated with NVC. But I agree that there’s a danger of overly substituting the ideas of NVC with the ideas about substituting words.
On the other hand, using specific words as “danger signs” that you might be making associated conceptual mistakes seems quite useful.
(Point of order, this probably makes more sense as a comment rather than an answer.)
I agree with this. I also think that once one learns to think in that new mode, bringing back “should” as a shorthand doesn’t necessarily cause any problems. As someone who doesn’t currently avoid “should”, I am OK with writing things such as “the claim that you should taboo ‘should’” as a shorthand for a claim that there are benefits from doing so—despite the irony.
I only meant to say (and only said) that the claim was associated with NVC. But I agree that there’s a danger of overly substituting the ideas of NVC with the ideas about substituting words.
On the other hand, using specific words as “danger signs” that you might be making associated conceptual mistakes seems quite useful.
I moved it.