I agree completely with the sentiment “The biggest barrier to rational thinking is organizing your mind such that it’s safe to think”.
What works really well for me is to treat my emotions as well-meaning but misguided entities and having a conversation with them: “Anger, I get that you want to help me by making me explode at and punch this person. That would have been really useful in the ancestral environment. Unfortunately, the police exists. So how about you calm down for now and preserve your energy, so that you can better help me when it’s more appropriate? For example, if society collapses and everything turns into a lawless wasteland, then Anger would be much more useful.”
The result? I am basically never angry, because the Anger emotion in my brain is rerouted to only trigger in a scenario that wont actually come up. But at the same time, I’m not suppressing anything, because I acknowledge scenarios, however unlikely, where anger would be appropriate. It’s rerouting instead of suppressing.
In your child metaphor: “I understand that you are hungry and I will get you food later. But I need to finish this work first, and it will take longer the more you complain.”
I agree completely with the sentiment “The biggest barrier to rational thinking is organizing your mind such that it’s safe to think”.
What works really well for me is to treat my emotions as well-meaning but misguided entities and having a conversation with them: “Anger, I get that you want to help me by making me explode at and punch this person. That would have been really useful in the ancestral environment. Unfortunately, the police exists. So how about you calm down for now and preserve your energy, so that you can better help me when it’s more appropriate? For example, if society collapses and everything turns into a lawless wasteland, then Anger would be much more useful.”
The result? I am basically never angry, because the Anger emotion in my brain is rerouted to only trigger in a scenario that wont actually come up. But at the same time, I’m not suppressing anything, because I acknowledge scenarios, however unlikely, where anger would be appropriate. It’s rerouting instead of suppressing.
In your child metaphor: “I understand that you are hungry and I will get you food later. But I need to finish this work first, and it will take longer the more you complain.”