Big picture (from the subagent model): The children (emotions) will go behind your back and talk coordinate with other sub agents if going to the parent is not safe. Children often aren’t that smart, and will probs pick a spaghetti tower solution. You will end up with behaviors you don’t understand that will be hard to change, and you will won’t be able to improve at meeting the needs of those children (because you don’t know those needs exist).
Some specific examples:
Me being “inexplicably” depressed on the weekends. Because I’d ignored my emotions, I could see no explanation besides “The brain will randomly decide to feel aweful, there is nothing that can be done about this except go to sleep and now I’ll probably feel fine come monday”. So there was a decent amount of pain and suffering that has since been dealt with, but when I was ignoring my emotions I felt like I was stuck with it forever.
Ignoring my emotions has a powerful narrowing effect on the options I have for building skills and getting more competent. When I saw a challenge, possible goal/dream/desire, if I didn’t immediately know how to get it, I would ignore my wants and tell myself I didn’t want it. There’s a way in which I was only able to make local optimizations. There have been plenty of times in which I’ve “just been doing something for the hell of it” and then realized I was skilled enough to enact an old desire. This is a pretty random/happenstance process. Now that I’m better at listening to my emotions, I’m able to Scheme towards things that I want that don’t yet feel possible.
Ignoring my emotions contributed to a behaviors were I’d be very quick to
Another Big Picture: Thinking ignoring my emotions is great feels like mistaking wire-heading for leprosy. Wire heading as “self modify to feel good about whatever my circumstances are” and leprosy as “I’m still being torn apart and damaged by things, I just don’t feel it anymore.”
Good point. I’ll try to add details.
Big picture (from the subagent model): The children (emotions) will go behind your back and talk coordinate with other sub agents if going to the parent is not safe. Children often aren’t that smart, and will probs pick a spaghetti tower solution. You will end up with behaviors you don’t understand that will be hard to change, and you will won’t be able to improve at meeting the needs of those children (because you don’t know those needs exist).
Some specific examples:
Me being “inexplicably” depressed on the weekends. Because I’d ignored my emotions, I could see no explanation besides “The brain will randomly decide to feel aweful, there is nothing that can be done about this except go to sleep and now I’ll probably feel fine come monday”. So there was a decent amount of pain and suffering that has since been dealt with, but when I was ignoring my emotions I felt like I was stuck with it forever.
Ignoring my emotions has a powerful narrowing effect on the options I have for building skills and getting more competent. When I saw a challenge, possible goal/dream/desire, if I didn’t immediately know how to get it, I would ignore my wants and tell myself I didn’t want it. There’s a way in which I was only able to make local optimizations. There have been plenty of times in which I’ve “just been doing something for the hell of it” and then realized I was skilled enough to enact an old desire. This is a pretty random/happenstance process. Now that I’m better at listening to my emotions, I’m able to Scheme towards things that I want that don’t yet feel possible.
Ignoring my emotions contributed to a behaviors were I’d be very quick to
Another Big Picture: Thinking ignoring my emotions is great feels like mistaking wire-heading for leprosy. Wire heading as “self modify to feel good about whatever my circumstances are” and leprosy as “I’m still being torn apart and damaged by things, I just don’t feel it anymore.”