I’m pretty sure you’re doing something wrong now. You’re being very vague and not giving any examples so I can’t troubleshoot anywhere near precisely, but clearly you’re trying to fit a square peg into a round hole and looking for the right sledgehammer for the job. You’re not Augustine of Hippo; you may endorse a set of rules as the Sacred Laws Of Rationality That You Are A Really Bad Person If You Don’t Follow, but if trying to follow them causes breakdowns, you’re just wrong about the rules. Taboo “rational”, and ask if each rule is a maintainable habit, possible to use explicitly in extraordinary circumstances, and if you actually want to do that. (“My life is worth exactly as much as some random stranger’s” sounds nice, but nobody can actually follow that long-term.)
You don’t say what kind of insane you are. You mention lack of social skills and that it’s a big problem for you, but that’s nearly orthogonal. For the first time in history, people are publishing usefulguides to sociallife. Of course any oddity is going to make it harder for you, but go to groups that share your interests, and you’ll find more people whose personality meshes with yours and fewer who go “It’s not making eye contract in the exact pattern I want! Burn the witch!”. It helps to sincerely like the people you’re trying to befriend, but a little dishonest manipulation can go a long way too.
If you have other insanity-related problems, I suggest you ask a psychiatrist for help with the root cause, tackle each problem directly, or start a Less Wrong mental health support group (so far the current procedure is “whine loudly enough to attract Alicorn’s compassion”, which might be a bit hard on Alicorn). Those bouts of self-destruction might be due to pushing too hard in bad directions, but might have other origins too.
Less Wrong mental health support group (so far the current procedure is “whine loudly enough to attract Alicorn’s compassion”, which might be a bit hard on Alicorn)
“Ask Alicorn to put you in touch with Adelene” may be a viable alternative for chronic rather than acute cases. I’m pretty horrible at providing direct support, but I’m quite good at getting a feel for the shape of peoples’ thought processes, both where they are and where they want to be, and using that information to connect them with resources that will help them move towards the latter. (My method is pretty slow, but it’s also compatible with the use of other methods that are quicker, so long as you stay in touch so I can keep updating my understanding.) I don’t follow LW much these days, though, so posting here and hoping I’ll see it or dropping message in my PM box won’t work to get you there, and Alicorn has my contact info.
I’m pretty sure you’re doing something wrong now. You’re being very vague and not giving any examples so I can’t troubleshoot anywhere near precisely, but clearly you’re trying to fit a square peg into a round hole and looking for the right sledgehammer for the job. You’re not Augustine of Hippo; you may endorse a set of rules as the Sacred Laws Of Rationality That You Are A Really Bad Person If You Don’t Follow, but if trying to follow them causes breakdowns, you’re just wrong about the rules. Taboo “rational”, and ask if each rule is a maintainable habit, possible to use explicitly in extraordinary circumstances, and if you actually want to do that. (“My life is worth exactly as much as some random stranger’s” sounds nice, but nobody can actually follow that long-term.)
You don’t say what kind of insane you are. You mention lack of social skills and that it’s a big problem for you, but that’s nearly orthogonal. For the first time in history, people are publishing useful guides to social life. Of course any oddity is going to make it harder for you, but go to groups that share your interests, and you’ll find more people whose personality meshes with yours and fewer who go “It’s not making eye contract in the exact pattern I want! Burn the witch!”. It helps to sincerely like the people you’re trying to befriend, but a little dishonest manipulation can go a long way too.
If you have other insanity-related problems, I suggest you ask a psychiatrist for help with the root cause, tackle each problem directly, or start a Less Wrong mental health support group (so far the current procedure is “whine loudly enough to attract Alicorn’s compassion”, which might be a bit hard on Alicorn). Those bouts of self-destruction might be due to pushing too hard in bad directions, but might have other origins too.
“Ask Alicorn to put you in touch with Adelene” may be a viable alternative for chronic rather than acute cases. I’m pretty horrible at providing direct support, but I’m quite good at getting a feel for the shape of peoples’ thought processes, both where they are and where they want to be, and using that information to connect them with resources that will help them move towards the latter. (My method is pretty slow, but it’s also compatible with the use of other methods that are quicker, so long as you stay in touch so I can keep updating my understanding.) I don’t follow LW much these days, though, so posting here and hoping I’ll see it or dropping message in my PM box won’t work to get you there, and Alicorn has my contact info.
Do I actually do this enough for it to constitute a pattern?
Named three examples by PM.