It is condescending because you assumed that I didn’t know what you were telling me, and you presume to tell me how to make decisions about what I “should” do. And the reason why it irritated me enough to complain is because I know the source of that condescension: I was asking a question in a vulnerable (i.e., feminine) way. And I got a cheap hit for not using language the way a man does. But I’m not saying it’s sexism; it’s just a cheap shot.
It is condescending because you assumed that I didn’t know what you were telling me, and you presume to tell me how to make decisions about what I “should” do. And the reason why it irritated me enough to complain is because I know the source of that condescension: I was asking a question in a vulnerable (i.e., feminine) way. And I got a cheap hit for not using language the way a man does. But I’m not saying it’s sexism; it’s just a cheap shot.