It depends what you want. The 4 were specifically about making a decision. Say, “should we fire Bob” or “we are firing you” vs “this is your chance to tell us why we aren’t going to fire you”. Where it’s important to be on the same page about the type of conversation you are having.
For telling people about a project, you probably want to share and connect. Give some understanding, be vulnerable.
The rest are the summary of the book htwfim. I disagree with a few of them and find nvc better.
“never say you are wrong”
“you are wrong” is a lot like “your map is wrong”. It is less accusatory to say instead “my map says this”. Optimum form would be, “I am confused. If I am understanding what you said correctly you said x, where my understanding was y. Can you explain why you think x?”
Silly question. Which “this”?
It depends what you want. The 4 were specifically about making a decision. Say, “should we fire Bob” or “we are firing you” vs “this is your chance to tell us why we aren’t going to fire you”. Where it’s important to be on the same page about the type of conversation you are having.
For telling people about a project, you probably want to share and connect. Give some understanding, be vulnerable.
The rest are the summary of the book htwfim. I disagree with a few of them and find nvc better.
“you are wrong” is a lot like “your map is wrong”. It is less accusatory to say instead “my map says this”. Optimum form would be, “I am confused. If I am understanding what you said correctly you said x, where my understanding was y. Can you explain why you think x?”