Someone else feeling uncomfortable for a small moment is, I think, a pretty reasonable side-effect when you’re trying to not always feel uncomfortable. I’m not hurting anyone, physically or emotionally, or any other such thing, but I’d rather be able to make other people feel uncomfortable for a few minutes instead of me feeling uncomfortable every time I interact with someone else.
How do you know? I have a friend who feels roughly as protective of her hair as an average person feels of their genitals. If you helped yourself to the end of her braid and dipped it in your water without a by-your-leave she’d feel violated and uneasy for days. I’m a little less neurotic about mine, and would shrug off such a thing faster than that, but if I thought I had any chance of getting you kicked out of the venue after you pulled that kind of stunt, I’d do it, on grounds of do not want (and “what if next time it’s not water, it’s scissors? What if this escalates every time I let it slide?”). Sure, she’s uncommon, so am I, but we also have a reasonable expectation that people will not seize our hair when we go out in public. I’m sure there are victims of various forms of assault with PTSD who could be triggered by your remark about their neck. Etcetera, etcetera.
If you need to make others feel uncomfortable so you don’t have to (and there’s an if there), seek volunteers. Do not hunt down victims.
Having someone volunteer would defeat the purpose, yeah?
The female whose hair I dipped in my glass was one of my friends—yes, she was creeped out by it for the moment, and yes, the other people we were with thought it was funny, but that was the extent of it. We’ve spent time many times afterwards, and laughed about it. I think either you might be making some faulty assumptions, or I didn’t include enough information.
Though, your crafting a completely arbitrary situation that makes hair-dipping a horrible thing, calling people who feel uncomfortable “victims”, and suggesting I may be a borderline sociopath leads me to believe that you might just be a bit uptight.
I’ll leave this part of the discussion, I don’t think continuing it will be beneficial to anything.
Someone else feeling uncomfortable for a small moment is, I think, a pretty reasonable side-effect when you’re trying to not always feel uncomfortable. I’m not hurting anyone, physically or emotionally, or any other such thing, but I’d rather be able to make other people feel uncomfortable for a few minutes instead of me feeling uncomfortable every time I interact with someone else.
Maybe there’s just a better way?
How do you know? I have a friend who feels roughly as protective of her hair as an average person feels of their genitals. If you helped yourself to the end of her braid and dipped it in your water without a by-your-leave she’d feel violated and uneasy for days. I’m a little less neurotic about mine, and would shrug off such a thing faster than that, but if I thought I had any chance of getting you kicked out of the venue after you pulled that kind of stunt, I’d do it, on grounds of do not want (and “what if next time it’s not water, it’s scissors? What if this escalates every time I let it slide?”). Sure, she’s uncommon, so am I, but we also have a reasonable expectation that people will not seize our hair when we go out in public. I’m sure there are victims of various forms of assault with PTSD who could be triggered by your remark about their neck. Etcetera, etcetera.
If you need to make others feel uncomfortable so you don’t have to (and there’s an if there), seek volunteers. Do not hunt down victims.
Having someone volunteer would defeat the purpose, yeah?
The female whose hair I dipped in my glass was one of my friends—yes, she was creeped out by it for the moment, and yes, the other people we were with thought it was funny, but that was the extent of it. We’ve spent time many times afterwards, and laughed about it. I think either you might be making some faulty assumptions, or I didn’t include enough information.
Though, your crafting a completely arbitrary situation that makes hair-dipping a horrible thing, calling people who feel uncomfortable “victims”, and suggesting I may be a borderline sociopath leads me to believe that you might just be a bit uptight.
I’ll leave this part of the discussion, I don’t think continuing it will be beneficial to anything.