Few people respond positively to being told something like that. At best, maybe you’d get a crestfallen “oh… okay.” Otherwise, they might try to talk you into changing your mind, or get angry, or act out to try to get your attention, or try to save face by discrediting you behind your back. Given those possibilities, why would you give an explanation?
Certainly this could be true in many cases; but I like to think that I have demonstrated in most cases that I will react in good faith to these sorts of things.
Is there a sort of person with whom you would give an explanation? Someone you knew would be much happier with even a short explanation and not bother you about it?
What sort of evidence would it take for someone to convince you they were that kind of person?
The reason I ask is that I have honestly never even once in my life been even the tiniest bit concerned about someone trying to discredit me behind my back, and though I could imagine circumstances that might move me into those circumstances, I imagine that you (as someone who came up with that possibility quickly) have lots of mental habits that I don’t and would like to understand.
Is there a sort of person with whom you would give an explanation? Someone you knew would be much happier with even a short explanation and not bother you about it?
Hypothetically, sure. But I don’t know why I’d want to completely cut off contact with someone I found so trustworthy.
What sort of evidence would it take for someone to convince you they were that kind of person?
Consistent signs of low neuroticism and a realistic, constructive attitude toward interpersonal conflicts.
I have honestly never even once in my life been even the tiniest bit concerned about someone trying to discredit me behind my back
Really? Have you ever felt pressured to “choose sides” in a conflict that you weren’t a party to?
Have you ever felt pressured to “choose sides” in a conflict that you weren’t a party to?
Yes, but never in a situation where there was any prior doubt about which side I was on. I’ve had people confirm that I was on their side, but I can’t recall anyone trying to persuade me to switch sides.
Few people respond positively to being told something like that. At best, maybe you’d get a crestfallen “oh… okay.” Otherwise, they might try to talk you into changing your mind, or get angry, or act out to try to get your attention, or try to save face by discrediting you behind your back. Given those possibilities, why would you give an explanation?
Certainly this could be true in many cases; but I like to think that I have demonstrated in most cases that I will react in good faith to these sorts of things.
Is there a sort of person with whom you would give an explanation? Someone you knew would be much happier with even a short explanation and not bother you about it?
What sort of evidence would it take for someone to convince you they were that kind of person?
The reason I ask is that I have honestly never even once in my life been even the tiniest bit concerned about someone trying to discredit me behind my back, and though I could imagine circumstances that might move me into those circumstances, I imagine that you (as someone who came up with that possibility quickly) have lots of mental habits that I don’t and would like to understand.
Hypothetically, sure. But I don’t know why I’d want to completely cut off contact with someone I found so trustworthy.
Consistent signs of low neuroticism and a realistic, constructive attitude toward interpersonal conflicts.
Really? Have you ever felt pressured to “choose sides” in a conflict that you weren’t a party to?
Yes, but never in a situation where there was any prior doubt about which side I was on. I’ve had people confirm that I was on their side, but I can’t recall anyone trying to persuade me to switch sides.