Together for 21 years, married for 17, two kids, all good.
The major thing I had to learn was how to communicate certain things, and when to keep my mouth shut. For example, she doesn’t ascribe to the principle of charity when it comes to strangers or the out group. We used to have fights about it (object level always, “why are you taking their side?!?”) before I realized they were fundamentally unproductive. And I can think of a couple of key times that she was right and I was overly charitable, including in a work context that really mattered.
On the EA front, we donate 10% of income, to a mix of things—hers more socially determined, mine more EA-ish, but good organizations all.
I think the world is full of people who don’t t think the way you do, no matter who you are, so it’s important to be able to form relationships with lots of kinds of people. Hopefully some experience/interest in rationality could help identify otherwise puzzling communication failures.
Also, practically speaking, less wrong / EA / rationalism are heavily male, so most people will need to find someone outside the community as a life partner.
Together for 21 years, married for 17, two kids, all good.
The major thing I had to learn was how to communicate certain things, and when to keep my mouth shut. For example, she doesn’t ascribe to the principle of charity when it comes to strangers or the out group. We used to have fights about it (object level always, “why are you taking their side?!?”) before I realized they were fundamentally unproductive. And I can think of a couple of key times that she was right and I was overly charitable, including in a work context that really mattered.
On the EA front, we donate 10% of income, to a mix of things—hers more socially determined, mine more EA-ish, but good organizations all.
I think the world is full of people who don’t t think the way you do, no matter who you are, so it’s important to be able to form relationships with lots of kinds of people. Hopefully some experience/interest in rationality could help identify otherwise puzzling communication failures.
Also, practically speaking, less wrong / EA / rationalism are heavily male, so most people will need to find someone outside the community as a life partner.