Some thoughts by someone single but with children, low baseline romanticism and relatively high productivity.
I like the ideas put forward a lot. Or rather the approach behind the ideas: Systematic and informed optimizing of one-self. Like other commenters I’m somewhat dubious whether this can work in such an elementary reproductive area but as I have some kind of experience in that area I think it merits some thought.
From some discussions I get that the frequency by which people are drawn to other people romantically (or otherwise attracted) varies a lot (see poll in other comment). I hear that some people have to deal with strong attraction multiple times a month. I personally got infatuated only once (and that led to a long-term relationship) and noticed first stages one single second time. So I seem to be at the other end of the spectrum. But I can relate still. I sometimes feel a longing for intimate company—but I want it right and this isn’t triggered by potential partners. Also there are phases of some sexual tension. These are interestingly largely absent if children are in the house—which they are often. Evopsych answer: Natural regulation of reproduction. I wonder if that work if these were not my own children.
So if I’m almost aromantic by nature and environment how come I think that I can contribute? Maybe my natural environment is one that lends itself to being aromantic and not the other way around. Or I can tell about how it actually feels to be aromantic—should your approach actually work.
Some thoughts by someone single but with children, low baseline romanticism and relatively high productivity.
I like the ideas put forward a lot. Or rather the approach behind the ideas: Systematic and informed optimizing of one-self. Like other commenters I’m somewhat dubious whether this can work in such an elementary reproductive area but as I have some kind of experience in that area I think it merits some thought.
From some discussions I get that the frequency by which people are drawn to other people romantically (or otherwise attracted) varies a lot (see poll in other comment). I hear that some people have to deal with strong attraction multiple times a month. I personally got infatuated only once (and that led to a long-term relationship) and noticed first stages one single second time. So I seem to be at the other end of the spectrum. But I can relate still. I sometimes feel a longing for intimate company—but I want it right and this isn’t triggered by potential partners. Also there are phases of some sexual tension. These are interestingly largely absent if children are in the house—which they are often. Evopsych answer: Natural regulation of reproduction. I wonder if that work if these were not my own children.
So if I’m almost aromantic by nature and environment how come I think that I can contribute? Maybe my natural environment is one that lends itself to being aromantic and not the other way around. Or I can tell about how it actually feels to be aromantic—should your approach actually work.