You mean: “Just don’t do it by lying to them about not easily verifiable facts” right?
Lying to your kids about certain classes of things is a great game, which, as others have pointed out, adults seem almost hard-wired to play. It’s a great way to stimulate a child’s inquisitive nature, in a safe and fun way. Adults will often tell their kids tall stories, or make up nonsense explanations for every day phenomenons, or play out fantasies as if they are real (Santa Claus falls in this latter category).
But for this game to work, the things you lie about should be both unimportant and easily verifiable. Lying about something important (“Your mom just died. Haha, I’m joking, she’s in the next room”) is just dickish, and will probably leave the kid traumatized. But the lie should also be obvious. If the kid neither expects nor suspects the lie, then where is the game? Then you’re just lying to your your kid, full stop.
So regarding Santa Claus, the way you lie about him is important. If you tell your kids he’s real while making no attempt to hide the fact that he isn’t, it’ll just be a grand game for your kids. But if you tell them he’s real, insist he’s real, and go out of your way to keep your kids from discovering the truth, then your game has turned into deception, and your kids probably won’t thank you for it later.
You mean: “Just don’t do it by lying to them about not easily verifiable facts” right?
Lying to your kids about certain classes of things is a great game, which, as others have pointed out, adults seem almost hard-wired to play. It’s a great way to stimulate a child’s inquisitive nature, in a safe and fun way. Adults will often tell their kids tall stories, or make up nonsense explanations for every day phenomenons, or play out fantasies as if they are real (Santa Claus falls in this latter category).
But for this game to work, the things you lie about should be both unimportant and easily verifiable. Lying about something important (“Your mom just died. Haha, I’m joking, she’s in the next room”) is just dickish, and will probably leave the kid traumatized. But the lie should also be obvious. If the kid neither expects nor suspects the lie, then where is the game? Then you’re just lying to your your kid, full stop.
So regarding Santa Claus, the way you lie about him is important. If you tell your kids he’s real while making no attempt to hide the fact that he isn’t, it’ll just be a grand game for your kids. But if you tell them he’s real, insist he’s real, and go out of your way to keep your kids from discovering the truth, then your game has turned into deception, and your kids probably won’t thank you for it later.
And the same kind of lying by elder siblings to younger ones is even more widespread.