(Your way of phrasing the question suggests you might be looking for a pointless argument with me. If that’s the case, please stop.)
My remark was not about the “fully responsible” part, but about the “your fault” part.
Note that guilt has nothing to do with being responsible for your own choices. The feeling of guilt is counterproductive regardless of what you choose to do.
Telling people “this is your fault” is a pretty good way to ensure that they feel guilty.
(Your way of phrasing the question suggests you might be looking for a pointless argument with me. If that’s the case, please stop.)
No, that is not the case. It does appear that I had misunderstood what you said, though.
My remark was not about the “fully responsible” part, but about the “your fault” part.
This being the misunderstanding.
I think I now see more clearly what you were saying. You were saying that a statement along the lines of “Everything wrong in your life is YOUR FAULT!” would be making people feel guilty on purpose. This I agree with.
(What I thought you were saying—and what I did not agree with—is now unimportant.)
Sorry for that accusation, it was caused by your phrasing which (to me) sounded suggestive of indignation, and following the scheme often found in unpleasant arguments, i.e. repeating someone’s words (or misinterpreted words) in a loud-angry-questioning tone. As a suggestion, remember that this way of phrasing questions can be misunderstood?
I apologise for my error.
Nothing happened that requires apologies :) It’s cool :)
As a suggestion, remember that this way of phrasing questions can be misunderstood?
I shall try to bear that in mind in the future. Tonal information is stripped from plain-text communication, and will be guessed (possibly erroneously) by the reader.
(I knew that already, actually, but it’s not an easy lesson to always remember)
Saying “you are responsible for your own choices” is making people feel guilty on purpose?
(Your way of phrasing the question suggests you might be looking for a pointless argument with me. If that’s the case, please stop.)
My remark was not about the “fully responsible” part, but about the “your fault” part.
Note that guilt has nothing to do with being responsible for your own choices. The feeling of guilt is counterproductive regardless of what you choose to do.
Telling people “this is your fault” is a pretty good way to ensure that they feel guilty.
No, that is not the case. It does appear that I had misunderstood what you said, though.
This being the misunderstanding.
I think I now see more clearly what you were saying. You were saying that a statement along the lines of “Everything wrong in your life is YOUR FAULT!” would be making people feel guilty on purpose. This I agree with.
(What I thought you were saying—and what I did not agree with—is now unimportant.)
I apologise for my error.
Sorry for that accusation, it was caused by your phrasing which (to me) sounded suggestive of indignation, and following the scheme often found in unpleasant arguments, i.e. repeating someone’s words (or misinterpreted words) in a loud-angry-questioning tone. As a suggestion, remember that this way of phrasing questions can be misunderstood?
Nothing happened that requires apologies :) It’s cool :)
I shall try to bear that in mind in the future. Tonal information is stripped from plain-text communication, and will be guessed (possibly erroneously) by the reader.
(I knew that already, actually, but it’s not an easy lesson to always remember)