For the people you interact with regularly, you will quickly accumulate the data. For the people you don’t often interact with, console yourself with the fact that they don’t matter all that much.
Or you could operate using priors for individuals that match whatever little you happen to know about them. For instance their gender. For some purposes that is a lot of information.
If you find it best to treat males one way (until they individually complain) and to treat females a different way (until they individually complain), then go ahead.
But (speaking to Phil, now) don’t cry about the unfairness of the existence of people who don’t fit your stereotypes. Don’t bitch that you are receiving mixed messages, when you receive them from mixed people. And definitely do not appoint one woman as spokesperson for womankind by asking what she wants “as a woman”.
There is no way to get through life without sometimes offending people. Live with it. But still, do the best you can. Rules change. Keep paying attention, and you will keep learning.
I made my reply because your quip made sense only as a response to a straw man. All the worse because it so smoothly presupposes a position that is trivially and obviously silly.
But (speaking to Phil, now) don’t cry about the unfairness of the existence of people who don’t fit your stereotypes. Don’t bitch that you are receiving mixed messages, when you receive them from mixed people.
Your presentation here is a more significant misrepresentation of Phil and this time it is one that is overtly poor form. In particular it is condescending and riddled with negative labeling while at the same time demonstrating that you completely failed to comprehend his words.
For that matter the re-framing of my statement as treating (males or) females a different way until they individually complain wasn’t much better. “Act like a Bayesian” isn’t exactly an outlandish personal habit for someone to have and complaints (hopefully) don’t come into it. If taking into account everything you do know while you are still making first impressions doesn’t reduce complaints then you are quite possibly doing it wrong.
Only if you have sufficient data on the preferences of everyone individually.
For the people you interact with regularly, you will quickly accumulate the data. For the people you don’t often interact with, console yourself with the fact that they don’t matter all that much.
Or you could operate using priors for individuals that match whatever little you happen to know about them. For instance their gender. For some purposes that is a lot of information.
If you find it best to treat males one way (until they individually complain) and to treat females a different way (until they individually complain), then go ahead.
But (speaking to Phil, now) don’t cry about the unfairness of the existence of people who don’t fit your stereotypes. Don’t bitch that you are receiving mixed messages, when you receive them from mixed people. And definitely do not appoint one woman as spokesperson for womankind by asking what she wants “as a woman”.
There is no way to get through life without sometimes offending people. Live with it. But still, do the best you can. Rules change. Keep paying attention, and you will keep learning.
I made my reply because your quip made sense only as a response to a straw man. All the worse because it so smoothly presupposes a position that is trivially and obviously silly.
Your presentation here is a more significant misrepresentation of Phil and this time it is one that is overtly poor form. In particular it is condescending and riddled with negative labeling while at the same time demonstrating that you completely failed to comprehend his words.
For that matter the re-framing of my statement as treating (males or) females a different way until they individually complain wasn’t much better. “Act like a Bayesian” isn’t exactly an outlandish personal habit for someone to have and complaints (hopefully) don’t come into it. If taking into account everything you do know while you are still making first impressions doesn’t reduce complaints then you are quite possibly doing it wrong.