What are some Internet forums that don’t feel unfriendly
Ravelry, mentioned above. It primarily serves as a place for swapping info about needlework patterns. There’s some criticism inherent in such a project (e.g. “I found a mistake in the pattern you posted”) but it’s mostly about mutual admiration and support. It’s not especially comparable to LW, though, since it doesn’t aim to be about writing or discussion.
I value the honest truth-seeking and argument that happens here, but I don’t think that has to exclude warmth.
My first-ever LW comment was not well-thought-out, and I got a curt “That makes no sense because ___” response. Currently that kind of thing wouldn’t affect me as much, but at the time it stung. Someone else stepped in with the “Welcome to Less Wrong” post that made it feel friendlier, which was good.
Another early experience that had me thinking “These people are jerks” was reading the Bayesian Judo post from the Sequences, which seemed to be about how to embarrass people at parties by proving your superior intellect even after they tried to disengage from the conversation.
I worry sometimes that I may be reinforcing this sort of problem. I can be welcoming when I’m mindful, but a number of times I’ve found myself posting comments (such as here,) which would be culturally acceptable in an exchange between established members, but may be too hard on someone who can’t fall back on the knowledge that they’re still accepted and respected as a community member.
On the one hand, we don’t want to drive down our standards as a community, but on the other hand, if we expect newcomers to be up to at least the average level of established members here, we’ll be filtering out a lot of the people who stand to actually learn from participating.
Ravelry, mentioned above. It primarily serves as a place for swapping info about needlework patterns. There’s some criticism inherent in such a project (e.g. “I found a mistake in the pattern you posted”) but it’s mostly about mutual admiration and support. It’s not especially comparable to LW, though, since it doesn’t aim to be about writing or discussion.
I value the honest truth-seeking and argument that happens here, but I don’t think that has to exclude warmth.
My first-ever LW comment was not well-thought-out, and I got a curt “That makes no sense because ___” response. Currently that kind of thing wouldn’t affect me as much, but at the time it stung. Someone else stepped in with the “Welcome to Less Wrong” post that made it feel friendlier, which was good.
Another early experience that had me thinking “These people are jerks” was reading the Bayesian Judo post from the Sequences, which seemed to be about how to embarrass people at parties by proving your superior intellect even after they tried to disengage from the conversation.
I worry sometimes that I may be reinforcing this sort of problem. I can be welcoming when I’m mindful, but a number of times I’ve found myself posting comments (such as here,) which would be culturally acceptable in an exchange between established members, but may be too hard on someone who can’t fall back on the knowledge that they’re still accepted and respected as a community member.
On the one hand, we don’t want to drive down our standards as a community, but on the other hand, if we expect newcomers to be up to at least the average level of established members here, we’ll be filtering out a lot of the people who stand to actually learn from participating.