IAWY, and I actually already replied to your question about this in a comment, but:
One of the prime issues for me as a rationalist trying to learn about marketing (especially direct/internet marketing) was having to get over the fear of being a “dupe” pulled into a “scam” and “cult” situation. Essentially, if you have learned that some group you scorn (e.g. “suckers” or “fools” or whatever you call them) exhibit joining behavior, then you will compulsively avoid that behavior yourself.
I got over it, of course, but you have to actually be self-aware enough to realize that you chose this attitude/behavior for yourself… although it usually happens at a young enough age and under stressful enough conditions that you weren’t thinking very clearly at the time.
But once you’ve examined the actual evidence used, it’s possible to let go of the judgments involved, and then the feelings go away.
In other words, persons who have this issue (like me, before) have had one or more negative social experiences linking these behaviors to a disidentified group—a group the person views negatively and doesn’t want to be a part of. It’s a powerfully irrational, compulsive motivator.
Hell, I had the same issue about exercise: I didn’t want to be one of those shallow, vain jerks that likes to exercise!
It doesn’t matter what the group is or what the behavior is, your brain picks up on the behaviors and attributes that signal participation in the groups you’re around. And if you’ve decided you don’t like the group… well, there you go.
Getting rid of it, however, is a matter of consciously re-evaluating the evidence and dropping your grudge against the target group...
Which means you’re never going to talk people out of it directly—trying to do so just makes people raise shields… “you’re trying to get me to be one of THEM, aren’t you?”
People are full of irrational compulsions that follow this pattern… and you’re probably not immune, as pointed out by your Tolerating Tolerance article. Most likely, the reason you have to fight yourself to tolerate the tolerators of fools, is because of your own intolerance regarding fools. If you let go of your emotional grudge(s) against fools (whatever those grudges might be), you’d find it to be a lot less of a problem.
(Then, you’d also be in a lot better position to ask others to give up their grudges… including the ones you wrote this post about.)
IAWY, and I actually already replied to your question about this in a comment, but:
In other words, persons who have this issue (like me, before) have had one or more negative social experiences linking these behaviors to a disidentified group—a group the person views negatively and doesn’t want to be a part of. It’s a powerfully irrational, compulsive motivator.
Hell, I had the same issue about exercise: I didn’t want to be one of those shallow, vain jerks that likes to exercise!
It doesn’t matter what the group is or what the behavior is, your brain picks up on the behaviors and attributes that signal participation in the groups you’re around. And if you’ve decided you don’t like the group… well, there you go.
Getting rid of it, however, is a matter of consciously re-evaluating the evidence and dropping your grudge against the target group...
Which means you’re never going to talk people out of it directly—trying to do so just makes people raise shields… “you’re trying to get me to be one of THEM, aren’t you?”
People are full of irrational compulsions that follow this pattern… and you’re probably not immune, as pointed out by your Tolerating Tolerance article. Most likely, the reason you have to fight yourself to tolerate the tolerators of fools, is because of your own intolerance regarding fools. If you let go of your emotional grudge(s) against fools (whatever those grudges might be), you’d find it to be a lot less of a problem.
(Then, you’d also be in a lot better position to ask others to give up their grudges… including the ones you wrote this post about.)