I think the key to the drowning child parable is the ability of others to judge you. I can’t judge you for not donating a huge portion of your income to charity, because then you’ll bring up the fact that I don’t donate a huge portion of my own income to charity. Sure, there are people who do donate that much, but they are few enough that it is still socially safe to not donate. But I can judge you for not saving the child, because you can’t challenge me for not saving them—I was not there. This means that not saving the child poses a risk to your social status, which can greatly tilt the utility balance in favor of saving them.
I think the key to the drowning child parable is the ability of others to judge you. I can’t judge you for not donating a huge portion of your income to charity, because then you’ll bring up the fact that I don’t donate a huge portion of my own income to charity. Sure, there are people who do donate that much, but they are few enough that it is still socially safe to not donate. But I can judge you for not saving the child, because you can’t challenge me for not saving them—I was not there. This means that not saving the child poses a risk to your social status, which can greatly tilt the utility balance in favor of saving them.
Exactly