I think I know the feeling quite well. I think for me anyways, it’s basically “fear of being made fun of”, stemming back to childhood. I got made fun of a lot, and physically bullied as well (a few examples that jump to mind are: having my face shoved into the snow until I was scared of suffocating, being body slammed and squished the whole 45-minute bus ride home because I sat in the back seat (which the “big kids” claimed as their right), being shoulder-checked in the hall).
At some point I developed an attitude of “fuck those people”, and decided to try to notice this feeling and not let it hold me back ever. It’s hard and I’m still not great at it. I still get this feeling kind of often, mostly when I know I’m standing out and will get looks or comments on it, e.g. wearing my Narwall mask to go grocery shopping. But to me it’s more like a sign to dig in my heels.
I view this as part of a ongoing project to overcome my inhibitions. I try to remain aware of my inhibitions, although it can be painful to recognize them, since they can be really limiting, and make one feel weak and ashamed. I would guess most people typically rationalize their discomforts as stemming from something legitimate. This seems really bad from the point of view of having accurate beliefs.
I think I know the feeling quite well. I think for me anyways, it’s basically “fear of being made fun of”, stemming back to childhood. I got made fun of a lot, and physically bullied as well (a few examples that jump to mind are: having my face shoved into the snow until I was scared of suffocating, being body slammed and squished the whole 45-minute bus ride home because I sat in the back seat (which the “big kids” claimed as their right), being shoulder-checked in the hall).
At some point I developed an attitude of “fuck those people”, and decided to try to notice this feeling and not let it hold me back ever. It’s hard and I’m still not great at it. I still get this feeling kind of often, mostly when I know I’m standing out and will get looks or comments on it, e.g. wearing my Narwall mask to go grocery shopping. But to me it’s more like a sign to dig in my heels.
I view this as part of a ongoing project to overcome my inhibitions. I try to remain aware of my inhibitions, although it can be painful to recognize them, since they can be really limiting, and make one feel weak and ashamed. I would guess most people typically rationalize their discomforts as stemming from something legitimate. This seems really bad from the point of view of having accurate beliefs.